Jan 26
It has been discussed millions of times but as much as it has been made to look like common knowledge, it really isn’t. If you are a drop-dead gorgeous woman who hasn’t gone into modeling, acting or porn, your dating pool by default will be a shallow one. This fact is usually dispelled by women who don’t fit the mold of this with statements such as “you can have ANY guy you want” or “you’re one to complain”. This gives the beauty instant guilt resulting in the not-so-hot girl feeling better about herself and the beauty thinking there may be some truth to this. The problem with this myth however is that a typical guy will be intimidated to make first contact and if the beauty pushes up she will be instantly placed into the slut category. For a seasoned wolf, the beauty will be tried because the wolf knows more often than none a beauty will be single.
Going into the dating pool, the beauty has to battle against insecure men, unspoken stigmas (will explain in the next paragraph) and female haters (who aren’t as hot). A beautiful woman is so deadly that her photograph will bring instant venom from any casually cute woman who sees it. Posing with her will yield unstoppable questions from the girlfriend/wife as long as you keep it. Your fellow guys will press on and on about who she is and whether you “blazed it” or not. See in our society, this site as an example, we worship beautiful people, some of us try to join them in their beauty through all sorts of healthy and unhealthy methods and some try to conquer them. Since this form of worship makes porcelain dolls and marble statues in our minds of a stunning beauty, whenever we encounter one many of us react strangely.
Male Stigmas on Beautiful Women
Most red-blooded heterosexual men will tell you to stay away from the beautiful women. In our minds a woman cannot be a total package. She cannot be nice, well-mannered and supportive as a beauty. She cannot be drop-dead gorgeous and not be a psycho or a total bitch. Many times a guy who gets in with a beauty will literally be waiting for bitch mode to reveal itself and if he isn’t that type then his friends probably are. If I had a nickel for every time I’ve heard a guy say that pretty girls are psycho, I would have a couple hundred dollars from that statement alone. It’s a harmful cliche because it gets into your head and it sits there. The stigma presents itself in books, movies and tales of woe from friends who have found a crazy beauty.
For the guy who lands a beauty and is happy with his relationship or marriage, other guys will hate on him as hardcore as women will hate on her. Guys will say stuff like “did you see her husband? He’s just some fat nerd cat, he has to be loaded”, or “how is she that fine and dude looks like some average frat boy?” Guys spew this rhetoric without thinking twice because of how we see things. In this world every guy believes that a dorky guy or an average guy has to date down. When we see a guy that has a banger on his arm it turns into her being either a gold digger or a lunatic. Rarely do we congratulate a fellow male who is happy with his beautiful wife, unless dude is a living specimen. Let a Denzel Washington, a Michael Jai White or a Jason Statham that is built like a linebacker roll out with the beauty on his arm and dudes don’t have jack to say. It is our view that only a manly, man amongst men, alpha dog, stud deserves to have a beautiful woman. Anything else gets hated on, which is quite funny since more times than none the guy hating would never, ever in 100 years step to that woman to ask her out.
Women hate Beautiful Women
This is common knowledge to the world so I will not spend much time on it. Women unlike men run comparisons with one another. It is one of the reasons they hate each other so much, ESPECIALLY if a woman has it going on. The attitude becomes that of “oh she thinks she’s all that” or “those are fake anyway”. The aspect of hate is not foreign to most women when it comes to beauties unless they themselves are the stunner and they know it. If you want to test your girl on this, just ask her what she thinks of Giada De Laurentiis, hell you can go on any Food Network relative blog commentary and read their thoughts on Giada. The confident women will prop her cooking and scoff at her low cut dresses but the other 98% will say her head is big, her mouth is too big or refer negatively to her breasts. It’s amazing how much negativity a woman can receive just for looking good.
What can a Beautiful Woman do to dispel stigmas?
Absolutely nothing, this is why it is a curse ladies. I will say this though, not all guys are intimidated and the ones who aren’t are probably the ones you will find attractive anyway. Manly guys with enough confidence and swagger to pull you without fear will be the ones approaching you. Now don’t mix these guys up with the married losers who will try to pull you for Gooma status. A married man has absolutely nothing to lose in terms of rejection, he doesn’t care, he just wants a chance at some beautiful “strange” that he would not step to as a single man. I see it all the time, dude gets married to average looking, supportive chick then runs out as many fine women as he can on the side because the fear factor is nil.
It amazes me how easily beautiful single women slide their panties off for someone else’s husband. Oft times this guy isn’t even a winner, doesn’t have the physique of a god and isn’t even a gentleman, just some married dick with a promise. Still I won’t be the one to hate the player, the game will keep on going regardless of me telling you about the traps or not. Women, it’s simple, many of us are literally afraid of a gorgeous woman telling us that we are not good enough, good looking enough and manly enough for you. Many guys will step to you expecting you to go into bitch mode and when you don’t then they will assume that you open your legs a whole lot. Not sure who you can blame for this but it is extremely complicated. I apologize for the cowardly section of the man race and I encourage you to find someone who can appreciate your beauty while treating you like a human being.
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on March 11, 2011 - 10:54 am
Oh, Em, Gee..you gave me life..My mouth dropped by the second sentence. The men are INSECURE and it sucks. I’ve had relationships that I thought were perfectly fine and ended up being accused of things that never crossed my mind because I find myself a topic of this ‘ribbing’ that you mentioned. Who knew that the fellas whispering in a man’s ear was more powerful than mine.
I’m not bitch, I’m not (too) crazy, I’m educated, I’m fun to be around and I’ll flip….pancakes just the way you like it…..and I was told by an ex that he just couldn’t believe ‘a girl like me’ was into him. Girls like me can have any man they want. What’s wrong with me if I’m standing here loving him……Oh, Kay….so I did all of this ‘me’ act that I do for nothing.it’s like being invisible sometimes.
I did post the picture that got me cursed out by 20+ different females after a semi-celebrity commented me on my photo on Twitter. Line after line I was reminded that I wasn’t shit, in various forms or annunciations.
Luckily I have a super swagger conservative alpha who knows what’s going on and only smirks at the looks he gets over the shoulder and he noticed the …’why is he with her…’ look coming from other men (who I know would probably smile or wolf call after me in anything). If they only knew I am all into my guy because he makes me feel beautiful (among many other of his great qualities).
Now I’ll go get my morning tea while the criticism gets flung at me.
Peace
on March 11, 2011 - 12:42 pm
Thanks for your comment Tracy and I hope your relationship is long and worthwhile for you. I see it too often, and I hear it more – the insecurity that guys put on beautiful women just because they can’t find comfort in themselves with being yours. I recently spoke to an ex of mine who is beautiful and her current guy is making a stink of her going to the gym, doing martial arts and dancing because other guys are looking at her… yes this idiot is asking her to quit life so that he can package her away from the world. But being beautiful and fed up with loneliness she’s sticking it out in hopes of him changing. He won’t.
There’s nothing more pathetic than an insecure man, if a guy can’t believe that you chose him then it’s time to find yourself someone who can appreciate you and appreciate the fact that you are with him.
on April 5, 2011 - 8:27 pm
Thank you for your insight, it really meant a lot to me to read this article! Just as some girls struggle with anorexia or bulemia, I have struggled with other girls seeming to always hate me for no reason. Its certainly something that I have often been upset about for most of my life– always wondering what was wrong with my personality. Now I am extremely sensitive and careful with my interactions with people. Well instead of turning into a basket case, I will learn not to take what other women say about me to heart, and to be more guarded with men– at least I will be able to quickly weed out the losers!
I just want other women, who struggle with their body image, to know that its really not worth it. Be happy with who you are, and that people will value you for your intellect. Because to me, if I could just find one guy who considered me a nice person because of my personality, it would mean the world to me!
on April 28, 2011 - 9:47 pm
Wow! Well..I always tell myself that I am an ok looking woman but I have people tell me that I am beautiful ALL of the time. My one good friend says that Im on Halle’s level of beauty and I don’t know it and this is what makes me even more beautiful. I see beauty in every woman tho…and I never get jealous!
Anyways…im here because I too have problems!! Im in the military, single and there are many guys single and available. People tell me that they overheard this guy and that guy or guys talking about how fine I am BUT NO ONE EVER APPROACHES ME!! I get SO mad!!! I AM NOT ALL OF THAT I say to myself over and over! I am just like everyone I have feelings and insecurities and I am a GOOD woman! I DONT cheat..EVER!! The funny thing is…married men are always approaching me!! Unattractive men too! The men that I like NEVER like me tho lol
I am also HATED by my coworkes! Some are really cool but many don’t like me! I OVERLY am nice and will make sure I contradict any preconceived notions because of how I look. I am a very happy person, I open doors for people..men and women! Ive gotten looks like..huh? LOL I give complements all day but this makes people assume that I am naive and weak! I ignore a lot things that people do to me. I don’t react because if I did I would have to take it there! People think that im stupid because I chose to ignore things and act like they don’t happen. They really think that I didn’t see it but in my mind I am thinking..they think im really stupid huh? LOL There are days I do speak up and put people in their place…but I just like peace!
I am a beautiful person inside and thats what I am confident about. I am insecure like many other woman and to be honest..I don’t think that I am Halle Berry level. But others do and I try my best to let them know that im down to earth and NOT ALL THAT! I am an African American light skin woman. I am only 5’0 tall lol And thats what I don’t get! I am such a little person…how do I get so much attention! I just want to meet a good man that ALSO looks good and be happy! Oh I have a 9 year old little girl that means the world to me!! lol I have also been celibate for some years now. Its an example I am setting for my daughter. I am open to date tho don’t get me wrong! LOL They just don’t come up to me (single men) and im old fashion…I don’t approach them. Ok..thanks for listening!
on May 18, 2011 - 1:54 am
It sounds like you’re going to have to be a bit more open to approaching men, Maya. That or carry a big sign that says that you’re single and looking for a good man.
on June 6, 2011 - 2:17 pm
LOL @ the big sign! Hmmm I wonder if they got a T-shirt that says that! LOL Thanks for reading and replying!
Maya
on May 27, 2011 - 8:37 am
This article i have read over a 100 times!! And each time that i read it, it is testament that there is no shame in being a beautiful woman!
I am both featured on the Hall in the Models section and write too–for the Hall.
And the part of insecure guys. I love it. Greg couldn’t have said it any better. I have come across so many guys saying “You deserve better”, And i agree with them! I deserve a man who is proud to be with me and isnt feeling like a juvenile about the fact that i chose him !
FANTASTIC ARTICLE!!
on July 19, 2011 - 9:17 am
Comment on the ‘crazy’ part.. it will make you nuts. It is very isolating. Jealousy will tear you apart. There is a constant target on your back. It makes you extremely insecure. No female friends (they hate you) no male friends (they just secretly want to score..indeed they will wait years. Until you are at your most vulnerable..try and sleep with you or date you. And when you turn them down guess what. They never gave a shit.) It makes you paranoid. And if you happen to be above average intelligence with a slightly dark and melancholy side you think yourself into a black hole of loneliness. Sorry world..but some of us don’t fit into your neat little box of expectations. When people tell me im beautiful now..I just smile and say beauty is fleeting and we will all be wrinkled sooner or later. When I was younger I would say ‘no im not’. As I got a little older id say ”thanks”. Now I just smile and say ‘that really doesn’t matter.’ Because it doesn’t. I run around with no makeup and dressed in my 11 year old sons clothes. My daughter is a carbon copy of me..and ill take my life experiences and raise her to nuture her education and inner self worth. Unlike me who was raised solely to be a ‘pretty girl’..and nothing more. Thank you for writing this article.. the subject does need some attention. Truly ‘beautiful’ people are walking stigmas. It is just like having a cleft lip..or some other deformity. Men fair better than women. Let’s encourage our little girls to be more secure. Resist the urge to tell them ‘your such a pretty girl’.. compliment them on their manners or intelligence. Don’t be like everyone else and support societies habit of making them only identify with physical appearance. Because when life does bitch slap them upside the head with age.. all they are is an empty ugly shell. No soul,, or no heart. All they ever did was develop their appearance. Thanks for listening.
on September 6, 2011 - 3:52 am
wow..thank you for writing this…this is my life story.. im a beautiful woman…and cursed…get treated HORRIBLY by everyone…i cant make any female friends…men just try to use me for sex…i cant even get a boyfriend..this is the same spiel i say over and over again. Yes men are insecure but isnt there a way we can even get A boyfriend?? many pretty women can but i can’t….im always alone b/c no one wants to be around me b/c im pretty…im a model but i refuse to go into porn…but it seems beautiful women are tossed in the gutter by everyone because of jealousy…your article is great….but really…what can we do to meet guys? many guys even pick on me laugh at me or make fun of me– they are so insecure they put me down upon meeting me….they try to mask how turned on they are- they even reject me sexually….ive been through hell and i cant even manage to get ONE boyfriend….im well aware of how people treat me….and usually upon meeting anyone its a nightmare or bad treatment or who knows what– extreme things….women despise me and avoid me altogether and men avoid me except for the weirdos who are desperately trying to get in my pants– teh cute good guys run away from me…what can we do….
i too like maya stated– am not jealous of other women….if i see a hot girl im like…wow she’s hot…and i dont get why women are so jealous of me…it makes no sense….approaching men doesnt work because trust me men run away from you– men treat you like a monster or leper…men never approach me they just make fun of me and if i dared approach them they’d shreak shrivel up and run away….theres nothing we can do except go into porn or just be single….
on January 20, 2012 - 1:16 am
Hi Lisa! I am so sorry that you have endured so much pain! I will pray for you lady! Keep your head up and put God first! Things will work out!! Take care!
on September 6, 2011 - 3:58 am
also…my experiences are like many of the women’s here…like maya too im very kind to people and friendly and happy…and i get only negativity from people and nastiness…people look at me like HUH??? what??? with disgusted looks …they treat me as if im a freak or weirdo…ive been called weirdo by guys and people….i once even met a guy online, he was obese…later he began making fun of me through text calling me names saying “I BET u cant even get laid”!!! hahah…making fun of me…putting me down..im thinking…hold on a second…im a beautiful woman and you’re a fat weird guy laughing at me– huh?? I cant get laid?…wtf? but this is all i experience…ive never had a boyfriend…and ive met only sociopaths who want to torture me…ive been told by guys and people “you’re TOO beautiful” hence the reason we can torture and abuse you for fun….and people too saying “youre so beautiful”…oh youre so beautiful…im thinking…err but i cant meet a guy and ive been single all my life and men reject me…so who cares??? or it just gets old….and yes u cant make any friends with women…ever….its impossible…the only female i was friends with years ago was using me to try to get guys at clubs…men yes just want to get sex…that’s it…otherwise they avoid yuo altogether….youre just forced to be a loner and nothing else. And worse…youre down to earth cool nice friendly…so why does everyone hate you and why are they so mean to you? they dont hate famous women…celebrities actresses—they admire them…yet if you arent a celebrity…why do they hate beautiful nice women…it makes no sense
on September 6, 2011 - 4:13 am
also, interactions with people .. are a nightmare…every interaction with a human turns into a game or powerplay or someone trying to put me down, dominate me, pick on me, make me feel stupid…its almost impossible to interact with people at all…humans hate you and will treat you with contempt, anger, aggression hostility etc… socially this makes everything a nightmare as social interactions even the most basic of ones can be very difficult with extreme hostility being displayed by others towards you. People can also be very mean rude or hostile aggressive towards you….and display extreme jealousy or anger…I used to want to write a book about what it was like to be a beautiful woman in this horrible society full of such awful people…who are so shallow insecure jealous and mean…b/c this is my life story and its all outrageous and difficult. Imagine just being picked on by people or treated badly by almost everyone– unable to make friends or get a boyfriend….just outcasted by everyone…well that’s what it’s like for some of us….people trying to control or abuse you…i mean everyone….
just being a loner basically….because no one wants to be around you because they cant handle being around you and if they are…they will either screw you over abuse you or who knows what….its scary and strange…but for some of us– this is our reality– we’re just outcasted for being beautiful and it seems the rest of society isn’t happy with dealing with beautiful women so they try to degrade them in porn…all my coworkers generally hate me and if not they will find ways to screw me over. Even if im working in a place and the people around me arent my co workers they will be talking behind my back, lying about me and trying to get me fired…its just what i deal with…but its hell and just not fair…and meeting guys— yeah right…men hate me more than women do…men are so aggressive mean and hostile towards me…apparently beautiful women are such a huge threat to them and their egos…its impossible to get a boyfriend and u sort of have to ‘take what u can get’ which means….someone u dont like so u refuse to do that and just pass and have to painfully stay single….attractive males hate you b/c u are a huge threat to their ego so they are the meanest to you….and its the lesser attractive males who say “wow i have a shot with HER”?! let me go ALL out and they try very hard…to try to get sex off you…and they keep trying and trying and thinking they’ll get it eventually….and then they fail and move on … but ive realized that as a beautiful woman….to stay far away from all guys, especially the good looking guys– i realize i cant even date or be around a good looking guy as they despise me and show aggression hostility and hatred towards me or wil be very mean to me….the lesser attractive guys are just takign a shot at what they think they have a chacne at– and then there aer guys who try to say they’ll pay u for something…so as a beautiful woman….youre either a loner, a leper or a prostitute and not much else… you will only get degraded and abused by people…and thrown in a gutter because people are jealous and insceure…and they arent happy unless they’ve degraded you to this low status….and that’s about it…sounds like fun right…
on September 6, 2011 - 8:14 am
Thanks for sharing Lisa, I swear I want to give you a long hug because obviously there’s a ton of frustration there. It sounds to me like you’re caught in that loop of negative which comes about when a person is forced to become defensive t survive the world. I see it all the time with beautiful women, the wolves come out and try and get with you so you build up an immediate defense mechanism to deal with them.
Many girls scowl, unconsciously look mean and walk in a defensive “don’t f with me” stance that is meant to keep them away. Women and men both see you from a distance and associate your look with being stuck-up, full of yourself or high and mighty. While in retrospect this makes no sense whatsoever being that people hardly carry on like that for those reasons, people still get violently angry when they see a beautiful woman sneering. IT doesn’t do you any good to use that defensive technique but by now it’s probably unconscious because your body and mind is prepped to deal with bull at every turn.
If you keep it up you will and may have already run off a good guy who was either shy, or lacking a good enough approach to breech your defenses. I am no psychiatrist but finding a way to move past the negativity into a positive, happy state will change your reality in more ways than you think. Sure girls will hate on you with some “why’s she so damn happy? She must think she’s got the world on a string” but your attitude should be “f— em, I’m doing me”. Us guys are attracted to happiness and positivity in a woman, it’s a magnet that we can barely resist. If you are beaming and beautiful even a shy good guy will not be able to help bumbling over to you and telling you how wonderful you look.
Long story short you may be your own worst enemy and not know it. F the haters, F the users, don’t let them control your life. Believe it or not you have a step up on most of them just by being someone they overly admire, want to sleep with or hate for looking better than them. Use it as your weapon, turn the curse around and be happy regardless and I guarantee you that your life will improve. There are some guys out there that are as tired of the games and power movements as much as you are. You will need to wade through sh-t to find gold, but don’t turn us all away on a whim. Good luck Lisa.
on September 6, 2011 - 3:12 pm
thanks for the response greg dragon! ive never met anyone who has so much insight on this its really cool…yes ive been told by peopel or even by my very abusive monster ex…(who was a sadist and cruel to me and refused sex with me and long story)… that i dont ‘use what i have or use my package’ and I shud dress up and look nice and other things…and ive thought about that too and thought “well i have something over them and shud use that power” but I really dont know how to…its kind of awful because…im not the kind of person who is stuck up or think im better than others….or even like to get those responses…I find it traumatic and difficult to deal with and confusing…im a caring loving person and want to give and be happy and spread happiness (as cheesy as it sounds)….and receiving only extreme negativity from people has been like a hell i cant describe…having no friends…no life and only guys trying to get sex off you…im sure there are guys out there but even those guys it seems end up either a. rejecting me or treating me badly b. trying to get sex off me….its something i noticed about all of them…. those extreme few with the ‘balls’ to try to ask me out do so in a rush and then even if i say yes they reject me still even after ‘they’ asked me out…kind of like…they were expecting rejection…. yes ur so right about the ‘sneering’ though im still very friendly….i smile and try to be nice to people but years ago found out how that worked out…..im more standoffish and sneery but that’s after people have already been mean or weird to me then i try to give them dirty looks….other than that, i work in sales….so im customer service oriented and nice to people….i also dont get it because ive worked with other pretty girls or aroudn them and instead of them getting bad treatment– they got hit on– me…if i get hit on at my job..its some guy doing something very bizarre, weird treatment then telling me taht he knows everything about me and my ex (huh)?? that he maybe read off the internet then accusing me of being bipolar…. wow wtf….or some guy stopping by my table, then texting me saying something odd and me thinking….how the hell did he get my number…wtf?? only weird strange things happen to me…and my ex—a 58 year old sociopath…who got off on controlling and mentally torturing me—treating me like a long distance puppet/slave, refused sex with me ever and im a virgin…. it seems i meet only guys who want to ‘use me for sex like a prostitute’ or those who refuse sex with me and reject/deprive me and only want to mentally torment/control me…. another thing ive learned as a pretty woman is MANY people just want to control you…its very odd— and makes no sense…why just control you…’handle you i guess and p-ut you in a bubble so they can handle you” this goes for men, women, family, strangers—i cant get into the horrific things my family has done to me–its not just my being pretty…itsprobably very bad luck too or b/c im pretty how i get treated by everyone…..ive learned that being friendly doesnt help b/c people are still so overwhelmed even males–nothing works?? theyre just gasping and takign deep breaths…. argh….thanks for the advice though….i think or feel im doomed….it took 12-13 years of this treatment to finalyl come to this conclusion….but being a 33 year old virgin who is supposedly ‘drop dead gorgeous’ and just getting abused by any human i encounter is like beyond hell…
on September 6, 2011 - 5:03 pm
Lisa,
I dunno. There is some massive disconnect with how you view yourself and how everyone else views you. If you were truly as friendly, cool, and pleasant as you say, you would not have these problems. Furthermore, and I’m not trying to hate, no one likes a whiner. I know this because I’m something of a whiner myself.
Women often fail to understand that they have the power to determine the next time they will be having sex. Even if you’re not that attractive, you can walk into a bar and just pick the nearest single guy. Trust me, if you are half as good looking as you say, the first guy you roll up on will be more than happy about it.
Now, I’m talking about sex for a reason. From your ramblings, you seem to be a little bit more reserved than most people. But your still a virgin. I think that THAT is causing you more problems than anything else. Because you are a virgin, you are far more susceptible to mental abuse because you just don’t know any better. Get it out of your system. Roll with the one-night stand and be done with it.
Also, like GD says…F the haters. A fat dude making fun of you? Who cares? Look at the source!
on September 6, 2011 - 10:18 pm
hmm mcthick…well no thats not the case at all….as its being stated here…beautiful women get mistreated for their looks out of jealosuy….so there isnt a misperception of me or how or who I am…most people label be as ‘quiet nice shy”….and its just a label they tend to give me b/c of my presence, persona…most people obviously have already labeled and understand me to be ‘nice and quiet’…and most of the tiem im too nice hence the reason people take advantage of me, or any nice person. I am also friendly and cool but just get shot down by people because again for the same reasons….those who are “beautiful” will get mistreated and shot down and thrown in the gutter for what they possess. We’re mistreated and that’s teh entire point of the post….so your comments don’t make any sense….if a beautiful nice woman tries to be nice, she is shot down just because people are jealous of her—that’s what jealousy does….it makes people hostile and aggressive to you….so what youre stating is a complete contradiction from what is being understood in these posts…beautiful women are mistreated for their looks…so even if they are super nice no one cares and will continue mistreating them…. as for losing virginity in a one night stand….thats not a good or smart thing to say to someone…being a virgin is holding me back in a mental sense but that’s about it because my ex tormented me and refused sex with me– so he turned my virginity into a nightmare and a joke….otherwise it wouldn’t be that bad… also from my ‘ramblings’ …. you cant comprehend who or what I am nor am i ‘reserved’….unfortunately i happen to be a virgin due to my circumstances but i know plenty of virgins who are 35 and up…and pretty females who are very intelligent professionals…granted they are single women looking to get married they have NEVER had a boyfriend….they dont go out and date but still…they are virgins at 35….teh problem for many of us women out there….are is that society is just full of a lot of crap and if you arent lucky enough to have the fortunate experience of meeting someone….and you also have bad luck and things going against you– there is little you can do…. ive searched and searched and gotten nothing and nowhere…..there is nothing i can do about it…ive been searching for 13 years….i guess i’ll just have to wait….as searching hoping and being active in searching doesnt do much unfortunately….
on September 7, 2011 - 12:30 am
ive also been on many dates–one day i asked a guy who i had spoken to ont he phone prior to our meeting…what he thought of me and the date—he said….i was amazing, and caring and that i would make an amazing wife and the guy that gets with me would be lucky….he really didn’t respond much after that, and then didn’t talk to me again– despite me showing interest after him making those comments….he also almost said it in such a way that he was saying it about anther guy and not himself..as if he just wasnt going to get me…for whatever reason…. this happens to women in general sometiems but in my case what ive noticed a lot…..guys just dont go after you or are interested in you unless they ‘want something’ or want to use you… a lot of males out there these days are also warped messed up or have been used by someone and are looking to use or control other women…. and no there is nothign wrong with people who can’t seem to meet a guy or are having issues with that– in most cases there are lots of amazing beautiful wonderful people out there who get mistreated or rejected by males or others– most of the time its the other person….the guy or whoever has issues, is isnecure, doesnt want to commit or who knows…
on September 7, 2011 - 9:44 am
Lisa,
Seems I need to be a little more direct with you:
1) You cannot have never had a boyfriend AND have an ‘ex’ who abused you
2) Study after study after study has shown that attractive people get better jobs, better treatment, and enjoy life more than ugly or even average people.
3) I don’t know a single guy who is ‘jealous’ if a girl looks good. That doesn’t even make sense.
4) Your advanced ‘victim’ complex is all about you. You are so convinced of your own importance that all the troubles of the world are yours alone to bear. Step back, you’re not that important.
5) To quote Tom Petty, “Baby, if you can’t change the world, maybe you should just change yourself.” Let me be clear, this is not intended as a dig, but rather an admonition to quitcherbitchin and do something about the problem.
As someone who has long dwelled in the ‘average’ camp, I gotta say that I don’t have a lot of empathy for your whining. You’re HOT for crying out loud! You have annoyed me with your continuous woe-be-to-me ramblings, and I have never laid eyes on you. What does that tell you? It’s not my jealousy over your looks that is driving me away…it’s you and your attitude.
on September 8, 2011 - 6:09 am
mcthick—he wasn’t an ex…he was a SP who tortured me mentally and refused to be around me or have sex with me– i just call him an ex–regardless…who cares…stop trying to nitpick everything i say then state things just because….if you are not a beautiful woman who has to deal with these issues then u don’t know what ur talking about..and there are diff types of beautiful women too– and levels….it varies depending on race/status/type etc….when it comes to mistreatment and everyone’s situation is different…
no friends…no one will hang around you or be around you if anyone is around you– they are either putting you down or insulting you in some way
women hate you.. and refuse to be your friend…men hate you more and treat you with contempt/hatred you cant even get sexual pleasure if you wanted to– men REFUSE to please you… men will reject you sexually….and run off to the first ugly/fat woman and do everything to her that he refused to do to you….
men treat you like a leper or weirdo…they refuse to treat you like a woman…in every aspect possible… i cant get sex, sexual pleasure–nothing…this is not an exaggeration….men if using me for sex will do things to injure or hurt me…rather than ‘pleasure me’….they will only do things to harm you…or be cruel or mean to you—or have power plays/powertrips…this doesn’t go for every beautiful woman but for me yes. If i ask a guy if he can make me ‘cum’ multiple times he will refuse…and do it once then instantly ask for gratification in return or while trying to do that to me, will hurt me mess with my head..or do something awful to me… this has gone for every encounter ive had with a male a long with many many other things yet you are a goddess with a beautiful body—and all males want to do is hurt degrade or destroy you everything with you becomes a power play, a game…an ego game…whereas men will play these games with you and treat you in a very low degrading way, they will do to other women 50 times what they refused to do to you—you are treated lower than anything possible people will ignore you, refuse to talk to you….treat you with contempt and hatred..i used to say that criminals and pedophiles got treated better than i did… almost all males do is dominate abuse or control you–and NOTHING else…its only extreme situations bizarre circumstances….nothing else….if they cant control abuse or dominate/degrade you—they’re out the door or will stop talking to you…. not only males but others just want to control/abuse/dominate you and take your power
away and will even say u are powerful and try to throw you in the gutter…men will even say “you have power over men”!1 while they are running away from you or rejecting you men, get off on rejecting you and get ego trips off it—they would prefer to reject you sexually or in other ways rather than be with you….they also act in very cruel ways towards you… you are treated lower than a leper…or like a leper…people treat you like an alien…as if you are weird, a freak show…they stare at you give dirty looks, yell at you….put you down insult you….run away from you….you cant be in the presence of humans without being
screwed over, put down insulted etc…
if you start a job you WILL get screwed over or if you are in the presence of humans
they will screw u over or do something bad to you—always….if you go places, people will start talking crap about you, bad mouth you…etc….even
follow you around yell at you, act crazy or even throw things at you….ive had people throw receipts at me, food at me…in various situations…people become hostile/aggressive towards you….and show it without a care and go to huge lengths to be mean or cruel to you….you’re a loner with NO ONE because NO ONE will be around you….those who are around you are either tormenting you, torturing you, destroying your life, screwing you over, putting you down degrading you…etc…. people treat you like an animal and as if you have no mind no soul….they feel they can do cruel things to you and act as if you are just an object—you are treated ONLY as an object by almost EVERYONE and no one cares how it makes you feel your presence makes people feel like crap so they do everything to bring you down treat u like dirt…etc….its a crappy horrid reality….some of ours anyway– no friends, no life, no fun…no sex no relationships…people act as if u don’t deserve to have those things….adn as long as they can control it will make sure to not let you have it….if you are even hanging out with them or in their presence…. we’re forced to be virgins, unable to meet men… everyone acts TERRIFIED of you….or scared of you…or again if they are around you
its only to GET something off you—whether it be sex, control, abuse etc…. this is a very abstract explanation of this but i wanted to write it in a more concise way but maybe next time….
on September 8, 2011 - 6:16 am
i cant even descrieb the things ive been through– the stories, the hell…the shock of it all….taht as a beautiful woman….some of us cant even get sex literally….we just get USED…and ABUSED….that means even sexual encounters result in a sick male wanting to try to USE you for HIS gratification while giving you NO pleasure…head games, power games, power trips, rejection…refusal…confusion horror frustration…… a man would rather REJECT me, refuse me…sexually….then run off and try desperately to get laid with the first breathing thing that crosses his path after he just rejected an extremely hot woman….he would rather mind f*** me than be with me sexually….he can sit there turned on…holding BACK his desires…jsut to be able to reject me….
he will refuse to do MANY things to me sexually… if i ask him, and turn it all into some bizarre sick game…of “i’ll do this to you IF you do this to me FIRST”….. yet if some breathing creature walked by he’d do that to HER 50 times without question….while he rejected you, refused you scrweed with your head… mind f*ed you, left you frustrated horny….this doesnt go for—ONE or two guys–it goes for…MANY….. its shocking and disturbing to find out….the extreme nature of what happens in some situations….but i know first hand and for me its shocking….
being a very beautiful woman—-men will REFUSE to get with you sexually, please you…and only have an interest in rejecting controlling mentally screwing with you, leaving you frustrated, horny and that’s it…or playing the sickest most bizarre head games with you …. so even as a beautiful woman….some of us can’t even get sexual PLEASURE if we wanted to literally…. because men will not give it to us….they won’t….while they wiill give it to ANY other FEMALE or CREATURE in a heartbeat but with you…it becoems a horror game of nightmares and confusion…. and the male will simply walk off…thrilled that he just put u through that hell….rather than have been with you or had a good tiem with you….. he will then go to ANY woman—whether shes fat/ugly weird…im sure a transvestite…ANYONE and never play those games with them and do to them what they REFUSED to do with you….
males will NOT give u sexual pleasure…they get off on torturing tormenting messing with…rejectnig abusing and DEGRADING some beautiful women….. rather than having even ANY encounter with them sexually….
on September 8, 2011 - 6:31 am
for instance if you asked a male to make u c** many times….instead of doing that…he will do something to make sure you are in pain rather than pleasure….he will do many things to scrwe with you, put u through hell….rather than pleasure you multiple times…in the end you end up in pain…rather than pleasured…yet he will run off to any female and do to her what he didnt do to you….in a heartbeat with no question…it becomes sometimes u understand….they dont treat me the way they treat otehr women….and in end i dont even get sexual pleasure….then they belittle and degrade you….after treating you in such a bizarre and cruel or mean way….after rejecting you messing with your head…or you are treated like a prostitute…as if its your job or duty…to give sex and you are ONLY a sex object and nothing else…but a sex object for them to USE for themselves…and give u nothing in return except screwing with you or your head…..and one comment they make is “ive never met a woman like you before”…. its a common thing some will say…. you are treated not only as an outcast in life….but in EVERy aspect possible even sexually….really its…youre so beautiful im not sure how to deal with all of this so i’ll put u down and treat u lower than a female….so u cant make friends, get a social life…u cant be around people.. u cant do anything ….then when it comes to even sex…u cant get a boyfriend….u cant meet a guy….u cant even get sexual pleasure or sexual fun if you want to….you are scrutinized, judged tortured on every level possible…..youre basically f**ked….you cant hide from this mistreatment….then u not only become paranoid, justifiably so…every experience justifies that paranoia….so it just grows and evolves…into a learned understanding…helplessness…fear….but no experience quells that fear as every experience continues to be the same….and the same….so you come to understand your position in life….as a nobody and nothing…someone who will never be treated as equal or even human it seems…..you will always be put down, degraded , treated as lower by ANY human you encounter—and there is really nothing you can do about it….except accept the shock of it all…when you come to the realization that as a very beautiful woman….you cant even get sex….when you are the emblem of ‘sex’… you ooze sexuality—you would be any man’s dream….yet almost every male you encounter REFUSES to treat you like a woman refuses to even please you….and only wants to use you abuse you, belittle control you or screw with your head….then a serious baffling stage sets in….an enigma that is so bizarre and odd….that it takes years to finally grasp….
on September 8, 2011 - 9:52 am
I’m not even going to attempt to read all that. Until you get out of your own head, your life will continue to suck. You have the tools to improve things for yourself, it’s just easier to feel sorry about it and whine. I will, however, call BS about having normal, single guys outright refuse to have sex with you. Even the assholes you seem to gravitate to are more than capable of bedding a girl and then slipping out before she wakes up the next day. Even moderately attractive women have success in this area.
A person cannot learn to be beautiful, either you are or you aren’t. A person CAN learn to adjust their attitude. You’re halfway to a winning combination and lucky you, you already have the inborn part. Unlucky you, you have to do the learning, which is hard.
on September 22, 2011 - 10:36 pm
no mcthick youre mistaken….if people have made up their mind to be intimidated scared feel uncomfrotable by you or be jealous of you– there is little you can do about it—plus, it is not my duty in life to go around having to cater to people who dislike me– im a VERY friendly kind aware person….i hate bullies and mean people, i go out of my way to be nice to people, and be friendly and i am consistently put down and shut down because of JEALOUSY….i have experienced this mess for over 12 years now…..it is NOTHING IM DOING…there is nothing wrong with my ATTITUDE b/c others are JEALOUS of me and instantly DISLIKE ME—everyone else has the ATTITUDE, not ME….for being BEAUTIFUL i am judged left and right, automatically discarded, talked badly about, lied about slandered, put down, rejected degraded….again NO THAT IS NOT MY FAULT NOR IS IT MY PERCEPTION OF HOW OTHERS TREAT ME….mi not sure what kind of life you’ve had but if u had no friends and everyone put you down anywhere you go life would be very tough….walk in those shoes for a day and then speak if you can….im sure you have friends or peopple who are nice to you….in my case i have NO ONE and most humans do not like me….every fat/mean/ugly rude female is KIND and has a great personality just b/c shes UGLY and im a ‘b&tch just b/c im beautiful” and its not fair or right… and u unfortunately cant understand the mentality of extremely jealous people– jealous people are HOSTILE angry people….they will do anything they can to get rid of gtthe object of the ENVY—and that’s what people do when they encounter a BEAUTIFUL woman who they are jealous of….that si not a fun situation to be a part of—its hard and difficult….to be shunned by jealous people everywhere and put down in just about ANY AND EVERY GIVEN SITUATION—to be the ‘weakling’ black sheep etc…outcast… if you are a beautiful woman who is exceptional who stands out amongst a society full of mostlg ugly jealous bitter people—this is what u have to encounter….
on September 22, 2011 - 10:40 pm
as a beautiful woman.. i acnt even get sex if i wanted to, cannot get a boyfriend, cant make friends….im a loner and outcasted by EVERYONE or almost anyone i meet or encounter….yet bertha the 300 lb b*tch with a very bad attitude…can manage to get several boyfriends…anyone can except women like ME who are treated this way…..we’re put down for existing…treated badly, talked badly about….everything that revolves around us is negativity and jealousy…..im NOT a tall arrogant stuck up anything….im very kind down to earth and nice…and caring and giving…and people just HATE me….women despise me with a passion and men do as well—everyone treats you liek an animal….an alien, a weirdo or a freak…..men REJECT you sexually—no not every guy but MANY the ones who want sex with you are the ones trying to USE yuo for an encounter to BOOST their stupid egos….thats it….youre either a prostitute, a conquest, or a freak or weirdo….you are not ‘girlfriend’ material…..though you are the PERFECT girlfriend….every thief, drug addict, any female…cheater liar psycho is GF material but not you, loyal monogamous virgin…..its a sad reality but you cant get anything in life….others are so jealous of you they make sure u cant make it in anything you d o—most ppl are trying to stop you crom successding or bring you down…and mcthick if you dont have the audaticy to read what i write then dont comment or reply!! or even attempt to!
on September 22, 2011 - 10:49 pm
the person who stated that beautiful women is a stigma—yes for sure….i always said that benig a beautiful woman u get treated the same as a leper….i get shunned outcasted, picked on, people have thrown things at me, yelled at me gone crazy insulted me….im treated the same way a leper would be treated exactly….people refuse to even talk to you in many situations and there was a time that socially—anywhere i went everyone would go out of their way to IGNORE me, not give me a voice—not allow me to speak….and just shun me—it was hell confusing and a nightmare…i used to cry and be confused…and that’s what they want to do– break you and keep breaking you….ive been treated so badly its shocking….by people everywhere….i used to say criminals arent treated as badly as im treated—most ppl who encounter me do not care to help me or secretly their intent wil be to do something cruel to me– so u cant trust anyone– and yes u become paranoid but justifiably so—b/c ppl aer very jealous of you and will do anything to do bad to you– after 12 years you finally get it…and u cant help but to be paranoid/raelistic….its not paranoia its reality….if you arent paranoid smoeone will do something awful to you but being aware you can prevent it just by knowing and stopping it with bvehavior and knowledge….its a learned conditioning that occurs after many years of bullying abuse and the same treatement by people and bad treatment… what shocks me is that after 33 years—unable to meeet a guy, men arent interested in me….very straneg and odd….unable to live life….b/c this society is full of jealous bitter sick people who hate those who a possess something they cant handle
on September 22, 2011 - 10:58 pm
i used to be a very confident person…could speak great….very articulate…extremely sociable and great at socializing, i can be friends with anyone, i like everyone.. i really love people….but every time i encounter a human—its a battle of power, its a nightmare….its the other person…insulting me putting me down, giving me dirty looks, rolling their eyes, chastizing, criticzing me…telling me they cant hear me….saying im soft spoken, making me repeat myself many times as if i can’t speak…telling me im shy/introverted… oh well u seem ‘SHY” introverted—and the people who say this to me ARE the shy/introverted people—people also constantly projecting who THEY are onto me– it has turned me into a shell of a mess…..i can’t speak confidently anymore as im asked to repeat myself numerous times….im alawys told im introverted—-even though thats not you, it slowly becomes you…..being called names, weirdo, this that….youre too this, youre not enough that—its so bizarre and horrendous.. no one will be friends with you or even talk to you like an equal so youre unable to make ANY friends which is against your friendly nature…..so a very intelligent beautiful confident woman….now is labeled and thrown into a label box of “shy introverted, weird, scared not confident” by jealosu people who have done EVERYTHING to bring her down… if i attemp to be part of a group of people and interact—im NEVER treated as an equal—ALWAYS put down always treateda s if im not good enough… and ALWAYS will be treated in a condescending way….so then u fear encountering these interactions b/c you will NEVER be perceived as an equal by ANY human period….no matter WHAT you do and its a sad thing….very awful and those jealous people will do EVERYHTING to shun/outcast you argue put you down try to start a fight with you….not let you be who you are….and take away your voice confidence, everything that is YOU…..you are now the ‘shy quiet, introvert who can’t speak and who no one can hear” b/c you are so beautiful….so powerful they cant handle it and have to go to THESE lengths to destroy your very being—-this is what I d go through every MOMENT of my life and every INTERACTION with one of those damned pathetic evil human sick beings…
on January 2, 2012 - 8:54 am
Lisa I I have to agree with mcThick there….you are shunning the whole world because you seem to believe that every person hates you because of your beauty…Beauty is not everything…it has its perks and disadvantages…it’s how you choose to deal with both that ultimately decides how meaningful you choose to make your life….
Live and let live….This world is filled with so many beautiful people both inside and outside…You just have to open your eyes and really look around!
All the best:)
on September 26, 2011 - 8:25 am
You know what Lisa, you’re right.
The whole universe has decided that you, and you alone, need to be singled out for a special dose of mistreatment. It IS impossible for you to find companionship in any form because the whole planet has decided to hate you. Furthermore, everyone on the planet spends most of their day thinking of ways to be mean to you and to bully you because, hey, you’re THAT important in the grand scheme of things.
Also, you are SO special, that the universe has ordained that you, and again, you alone, will be treated differently than every other attractive person on the planet. In fact, YOU will be treated as an ugly person with an ugly soul and an ugly personality. Not because you have any of these things, but because you DON’T have these things.
You actually boiled your own problem down to single sentence:
See…that right there is the attitude of a bitchy girl. If you’re so lonely and alone, then it damn well IS your job to make people like you. As I quoted before, if you cannot change the world, maybe you should just change yourself. The continuous litany of bad things that you write about in stream of consciousness mode is not helping your cause at all. You tell the story so many times that you don’t even notice the inconsistencies and logical flaws anymore. Try telling yourself a different story.
And, once again, I’m going to point out that I don’t like you because you’re a whiny and unwilling to make any change that might help you. I don’t like you because you’re essentially giving the world the finger and then bitching about it when dudes don’t throw themselves at your feet. I do NOT no like you because you’re a nice, pretty girl that hates bullies. I do not like you because you’re so self-centered you see everyone else on the planet as your personal enemy, trying to tear you down because we’re all SO jealous.
Please.
Grow up.
Life is what you make it.
on October 27, 2011 - 3:57 am
Post 1:
Hi The Dragon,
Thanks for the well-written article! I agree with most of your points!!! I just want to share my point of view as a beautiful woman as well!
Whenever I hear people say, “beauty is a curse,” I would tell myself with certainty that, if I had to choose again, I’d still be pretty and be cursed.
Here I only want to share my personal experience and I don’t speak for all beautiful women.
Most men would think I’m hot and sexy because of a combination of my face, body, confidence and personality. I’ve always enjoyed the attention and benifits of being a beautiful woman–being treated nicely/with privileges, offered with help, gifts, dinners, drinks, and so on. People remember and notice me more and it seems that things get my ways mostly. When I was little I thought people were nice to me because I was nice and friendly to them, and I had a sweet smile. But I’m an adult now and as my hotness increases, the nice treatments also increase. Often I think, wow, thanks God for being so sweet and making me a cutie! However, I also noticed and want to point out a few downsides of being a beautiful woman, which you already pointed out here in this article!
In terms of friendship, I must say that I have had girl friends who love me but at the same time they are jealous to death. They would find ways to attack me out of the blue, in the presense of men. One example: a girl friend who was a few years younger than me said to this hot guy who offered us drinks at a club, “oh ask Nicole, she is the older one here (exaggerated the OLDER). She is 24 and I’m only 21!” At that point I thought to myself, “wtf, men don’t care about the age if the girl is hot!” And this guy later told me that my friend was a bitch, which I thought she was. (People tell me Latin women are very jealous.) I have many more examples but you get the point! It happens to me many times with girls, that when at a party or social meeting, if I have more attention than them, then they would NOT like it and their faces would turn GREEN (aka the jealous color lol). One thing contraditing is that I do feel love from them. I just also feel the intense jealousy. The men here told me the reason for that is LA is a place for pretty people and attention so most women are in a competitive mode. Oh well!
Continue on the next post…
on October 27, 2011 - 4:10 am
Post 2:
In terms of romance, I’d say sometimes it does get difficult. Unless the man is really secure about himself, otherwise, it is not likely to work out. More often than not, I could tell that men treat me differently. The boys in college are even worse! A lot of them are shy, awkward, and get tensed up whenever I’m present, even though I’m a really fun, easy-going person. The fact that I am well-maintenance might also contribute to this fact (nice clothes with nicely done nails, hair, etc) Once we start dating, perhaps they play more games, pretend that they don’t care, try to get me jealous, won’t get too serious… just to name a few. I’ve been single for almost a year and whenever I tell men that, they tell me I’m lying. They would tell me I could have any man I want. I guess being able to have my picks and do get with them are two different things! They already assume that I’m taken. Hmmm, assumption assumption!
Anything can be good and bad, depending on how you look at it. But at the end of the day, we can’t change how other people think and I’m not here to complain because I am already so lucky to have something that everyone wants and adores.
Although beauty could be a curse, I’m still very grateful that I’m blessed with my looks. But of course, the one thing I really like about myself is my brain and my beauty won’t last forever. And someday someone will be sweet and confident enough to find out!
p.s. Sorry for the typo, if there is any. My spell-check doesn’t work!
Thanks for reading and good luck!
on October 27, 2011 - 8:21 am
Nicole, you sound like a real Lady Dragon. It’s good to hear the perspective of another woman that is beautiful, comfortable with being beautiful yet cogniscent of the world’s view of her. So you’re from the Bay? No doubt there are many lovelies there trying to break into Hollywood and otherwise, I feel your pain with the jealousy, it’s real for women all over the country. Thanks for sharing your story… sometimes curses aren’t all bad I suppose.
on January 2, 2012 - 8:36 am
Your thoughts goes to show that you truly are a beautiful women inside and outside Nicole! I love your attitude girl! keep rocking!:)
on November 1, 2011 - 4:03 pm
Hi ..I too suffer from the beautiful woman’s curse I suppose I’m done feeling sad guilt alone and being a victim to others insecurities so I stumbled across this and and happy to see I am not the only one with the same awful situation…..good news is we’re not alone some of us are here this may be a lil childish lol but let’s be friends
I’m 25 with 3 kids and I feel like I’m not in a sence to be confident or sweet because I get labeled as a biatch or an ugly person inside ..a snob …shy ect…. So LADIES please feel free to stand up for yourself and what you are and no ppl don’t have to like it and do not cater !!! To ppl that need an ego boots and are trying to get it by putting you down that does not make you an ugly person that makes you a grown woman with a voice and the right to defend yourself 
and for the cocky pretty woman stop ruining it for the good ones pllz its not cute and thank u everyone for posting I have a new found in my what was it …..self centered attitude that the world revolves around me lmao ( please note this is also known as confidence) I now feel sorry for ppl shallow enough to miss out on who I am bc o how I look …your loss,and to that I might even start wearing earings again lol
on November 7, 2011 - 9:46 am
I’m really not trying for this to come off as rude…but all the so-called “beautiful” women posting here who are so cursed make me laugh.First of all,alot of people who think they are so beautiful,usually aren’t.The simple fact that you come on here saying how beautiful you are shows conceit,and lots of people find that quality unattractive.Maybe it is your blatant conceit for yourselves that is turning people off? Confidence is one thing,thinking the world revolves around you and your looks is another.
I’m just sayin…
on January 20, 2012 - 1:09 am
Nah…cuz as I stated a few months ago..”I always tell myself that I am an ok looking woman but I have people tell me that I am beautiful ALL of the time. My one good friend says that Im on Halle’s level of beauty and I don’t know it and this is what makes me even more beautiful.” So, no conceit here.
on November 8, 2011 - 2:29 am
I agree that being beautiful is a curse. Unless youve lived it ..you wouldn’t understand it ….Lisa you are not alone and you are not whiny. I found your posts to really hit home. A lot of women wouldn’t have the courage to talk so openly especially over the internet where criticism can come out of the wood work which is the last thing any of us needs. I was sitting here crying because I have been told those same things oh youre so beautiful, you can get any man you want etc etc and men have flown all types of insecurities at me. Men have even told me they are mean to me because im pretty. Contradictory to that is that I have real low self esteem after feeling like me being nice, pretty and a genuinely good person has resulted in the worse treatments. The fact that I am always single …it hurts. The fact that I just want people to appreciate my personality and stop focusing so much on what I look like. I just want a guy that wants me for me instead of to try to have sex with me or to treat me like crap so they can get a kick out of it or boost their ego. There are plenty of books that verify this assessment as to the beautiful woman curse. The art of seduction book talks about this very same concept and breaks it down. It says to seduce a beautiful girl just get to know her on the inside…crazy. I think the ones on here can reach out to each other and maybe develop friendships with each other since we are having difficult times with that as well. ((hugs)) to all the pretty lonely girls out there.
on November 8, 2011 - 8:34 am
A truly beautiful person usually doesn’t see how beautiful they really are and doesn’t go on and on about themselves either.
Some of the most beautiful women I have known have been ugly on the inside and therefore,not attractive.
I agree with the other poster who said quit whining about it.Be happy you are beautiful,but do not let it define who you are.
I’m glad I’m just cute
on January 2, 2012 - 5:23 am
Hi there! I completely agree with Julia, when she says that a truly beautiful person usually doesn’t focus on how beautiful they really are, and go on and on about themselves.
And yes, I have been given compliments about my looks by many.
And I would be lying if I denied the fact that I have faced a few difficulties as outlined here, by some of the writers.
But I cannot be arrogant about my looks, nor judge another person based on their looks. Because we are all unique and beautiful in our own special way. Our appearance is just one very minor part of who we truly are.Instead, I firmly believe that it is very important to look into our inner souls and see the unique beautiful inner qualities we posses.
That doe not mean I don’t take care of my looks…I do. But that is mostly because I want to be healthy, happy and feel good about myself. But I also know that a person’s appearance cannot possibly define who we are, and so I do not think that the whole world revolves around my looks. I am just one of many unique human beings inhabiting this earth, with so much more to give to this world, rather than making my world revolve around my looks.
One thing I always do when with a room full of strangers, is to always make it a point to give a heart felt and friendly (not suggestive) smile to any person I come in contact with. Some people may think me weird for smiling at them, when they are a complete stranger to you, but more often than not, people genuinely smile back at me and we both feel better instantly. I truly believe in the power of staying positive, and making a positive connection.
It’s all about being kind, compassionate and understanding and trying to put ourselves in the other person’s shoes, to see why they are feeling the way they are feeling….. If they choose to reject us then so be it…let them free and let ourselves free…life is too short and beautiful, to keep dwelling on past hurts, rejections and disappointments.
For all those of you who think you are facing difficulty because of your looks, believe me ….it is only a minor problem which can be overlooked, if we choose to do so….There is so much more within us that is real and valuable……look into yourselves and see the beauty within you!
on January 7, 2012 - 5:54 pm
Thank you for reminding me while I’m still single despite the fact that most men would kill for their (late 30s) romantic partner to look like me. I should have never enlisted in the military then got an education. I did not know that I would start to get better looking AFTER the age of 24. Looks like I’m hopeless cos I don’t seem to be getting uglier… And I’m nearing 40! No point in being nice, caring anymore. I’m cursed thanks to modern stupidity.
“…. My only problem is, THEIR insecurity”- JLo
on January 7, 2012 - 6:11 pm
Also, I need to point out something really quick here to the women who ate accusing the self-proclaimed beautiful of being self centered and conceited. THIS is the very attitude that is mentioned in this article concerning not-beautiful women against the beautiful women, Women who are esthetically beautiful are tormented by society based off their looks. It’s almost as if they are nit allowed to know they are beautiful; sure as he’ll not allowed to admit it to anyone. If you are hated because you are beautiful ” it’s really because you are ugly inside”. Of course, classic response of a hater. Beautiful women need to know they are beautiful. They should also know it is a curse so they can maneuver through life with the proper social skills to deflect (not counter attack) jealousy and insecurities of others. Unfortunately, this is a skill embodied by very very few therefore rarely taught,
A man calls you beautiful. You say thank you & smile, but let your body language say, don’t overstep your boundaries buddy!
If you walk into a room full of average women and you can feel the hate cutting through the atmosphere like daggers, you introduce yourself to everyone, make strong but not intimidating eye contact, and let all those women know you are friendly and unthreatening.
Wear clothes that are conservatively flattering
When dating, make it clear to men you are approachable and friendly. And let your body language tell them you are strong but feminine, fun but morale, and that you are capable of being a good woman.
Those who don’t or “refuse to” understand you can go f*ck themselves. You owe NOBODY an explanation to who you are and it’s not your responsibility to bend over backwards any more than anyone else to make others Ferlinghetti confortable around you.
Beautiful women, lead by example and be strong yet beautiful inside too. Do not cave into society’s need to protect the weak minded people. They’ve already done enough damage! Do not let them damage you!
on January 20, 2012 - 1:13 am
OMG thats SO true!! I remember when I was younger I would always quote, “when ugly people say that they are “FINE”, its considered confidence but when a true good looking person say that they are “fine”….they are considered conceited”! LOL So not fair! lol