This is probably one of the harshest situations that a woman will want to be in when it comes to matters of the heart. The guy with whom you are with has tapped out on his patience with you and seeks greener pastures in order to procure a more attractive, less naggy version of yourself. Don’t give up just yet, there may be a chance for you to save your relationship before he has the sit down with you.

Find out what the issue is
Sometimes us guys will want to dump a girl over what seems like the most trivial crap out there. Maybe you talk too much, maybe you’ve gained weight, maybe you say the wrong things constantly, or maybe you won’t give him enough space. The thing you want to do is to find out whether the problem is fixable or not. Will changing that little annoyance that drives him away mean a complete lifestyle change for you, or is it something that you thought was cute but isn’t, that you can cut out without issue.  If it’s an unforgivable sin, you either promise it will never happen again, or take it as a life lesson and let the man fly free to recover. Sometimes women do things unconsciously and the more passive-aggressive men will let it sit in the back of their mind until a time later when it can’t be chained and hidden away any longer.

Unforgivable sins can range from disrespecting a family member, sleeping with someone else, emasculating him in front of his people or taking things too far during an argument. When you have your talk and you hear words like “unforgivable”, “disrespectful” or “disappointing”, you may want to start packing because his mind has already been set.

No time for weakness, stay strong
There will hardly be a time when a truly pissed off man will abandon his pissed off state in order to console you. When it comes to an argument or tense discussion about parting ways, seeing you cry is no different than seeing you angry. It’s all the same because compassion is normally not a part of the formula. He either wants you out of his life, or he wants to know that you are willing to stop whatever it is you are doing or have done to cause this discussion to be taking place. Hold back the tears, stand your ground and be mature about it.

Absolutely no begging
Sometimes you love a person so much that the thought of living without them is like a loss of everything worthwhile. Like a punch in the gut it knocks the wind out of you and you cannot fathom how tomorrow will start without the thought of that person being in your life. Thoughts like these lead to desperation, you will get emotional, irrational and hysterical and there will be the overbearing temptation to beg. Nothing will push a fed-up person faster over the edge than to have their victim fall to the lowest of low and beg them. If the guy is a manipulator he can accept the begging and forever use the incident to keep you in check whenever a disagreement surfaces. How long would you want to stay with someone who does that? If the guy has been offended and it is the reason for him leaving, then the begging is not what he wanted to hear, he wanted to hear promise of change along with the action of doing so. Begging shows him that you are unwilling to change but instead wish for him to deal with it based on your pathetic cry for help.

Remind your man that you are still the cutey that he stepped to back in the day and you are a few adjustments away from returning to that persona. He must know that you are worth sticking it out for, and that you deeply regret affronting him with whatever the offense was. Be mature, strong and up-front with it and  showcase the 3 R’s of apologizing – Regret, Reason and Remedy. Apologize for what it is you have done, tell him it won’t happen again (make sure this is true) and then f-ck his brains out when he decides to give you another chance.

Written by Greg Dragon on Thursday, May 13, 2010 

Filed under Married Life, Relationships
Tagged with couple, desperation, disrespect, patience