Aug 21

There is always an explanation as to why one is single (no time, demanding job, just plain old don’t want a relationship, etc), but for some reason, it’s unacceptable for pretty “nice girls”, who seem to have it going on, to not have a man in their life that they do not call “daddy”. As one of the many nice girls who have been ate up and spit out by past mistakes, I wanted to take time to give some insight as to why some women, very pretty ones at that, tend to be at the wrong end of that oh so dreaded “You are such a great person, why are you single?!?”. Nice girls more than likely have a hidden insecurity that stems from their childhood. Understand that pretty girls who are “nice” usually have some sort of past middle/high school hurt that separated… [Read more]

Aug 19

Such a cliché to say the nice guys finish last. I have had my share of bad boys and had numerous conversations with my girls about why we go for the bad boy type vs. the nice guy. All have several reasons but it boils down to a few general topics that will give a bit of insight to why women stay with the one who treats them like yesterday’s garbage, but that dude who showers her with compliments and is always there when she needs him is kept in the “glass jar”. Nice guys tend to have a weak chase game. Most women have an innate need to feel wanted and love being pursued. Nice guys have an approach where they give distance. They do not want to come off as rude or like they just want to get into your pants. This is… [Read more]

Aug 18

I recently read an article that basically stated that marriage is a dying, archaic institution, especially for Black folks.  Marriage is to partnerships what Beta-Max was to the revolutionizing of in home movie viewing.  If 30 is the new 20, as professed by Jay Z, and we all agree that 20 is hot,  then marriage is like 104 years old.  Suffice to say, it is not hot.  It is allergic to being hot. Now, as a married woman of some years (even that ever crucial 5th one), I can’t, for the life of me, understand what the problem is.  Marriage offers so many benefits, why would one try so hard to avoid it?  First off, umm… the tax break.  And please don’t mess around and throw a kid or two on top of that (only your own please), it’s like Uncle Sam is making it… [Read more]

Aug 17

“Simplicity is the keynote of all true elegance” – Coco Chanel When you think of the sexy image that is the 1920’s Flapper, think of Coco Chanel. Her designs were meant to give women a sense of freedom and her use of poor fabrics cut to look rich made her a legend. Her designs revolutionized fashion and her tremendous beauty made the coin purse of many a suitor fall open easily. You may know her name from the signature fragrance but this Hottie of History has been making money since the early 1900s. Her first fragrance “Chanel No. 5” was the first to have a designer’s name placed on it and the year was 1912. Gabrielle Coco Chanel was born in a poorhouse and grew up in the orphanage of a Roman Catholic monastery. While in the orphanage she learned to sew and at 18… [Read more]

Aug 14

Have you ever been walking along listening to you ipod and a song comes on that either moves you to want to break out in full Flashdance mode, or break down crying like the end of “Imitation of Life?”  And all you can think is that you want someone else to hear it and feel what you feel…but you cant.  Later, you try to describe the song  and how it made you feel to someone, but they look at you like you’re crazy, but offer you affirmative responses, like they get it, when you both know they don’t.  You both know that they can’t get it; it’s impossible.  Because it wasn’t just that song it was that moment.  It was yours, alone. That’s what a argument between two people who love each other is like.  Everyone walking through life with uncomfortable, ill-fitting ear buds in,… [Read more]

Aug 13

When new people visit my house, the first thing that they usually note is that it looks almost too neat and clean to live in. This didn’t make sense to me until I started visiting people and noticed that human beings like comfort and comfort and order aren’t the very best of friends. It is easy to assume that I meticulously scrub my place and arrange stuff daily but in reality I probably do so far less than even the messiest of individuals. My secret lies in methodology and I aim to share my method of order within this article in order to help you pack rats who want to shift to the orderly line of decorating. Don’t be Offended It’s Probably Not Your Fault Most of the times we reflect our parents in the way we handle our homes. A person who comes from… [Read more]

Aug 12

I know a lot of you single women out there are pretty tired of the cliché statements and reasoning behind you not having a man. We know them so well that we could write an entire concerto to the sound of repetitive one-liners, anecdotes and reasons but I aim to explain from a personal standpoint what has scared me away from certain women and how I broke it off.  In the first part of this series, I will break down the three age levels of women in dating (especially online) and make general assumptions based on experience. The second half will cover real experiences and the last part will wrap it all up with a nice blue bow. To begin, let me put an annoying sentiment to rest where women with assets think that a man has to “earn” their attention. This line of thinking… [Read more]

Aug 07

My life is a contradiction, the most disturbing of which is the fact that I drive a minivan.  It’s not even a slick one; you know the ones with televisions, heated seats, automatic doors and real windows everywhere that open.  Now, I’m young (enough), and cool (enough) , yet everyday I get behind the wheel of a silver turtle on wheels.  While the minivan offers many amenities, such as the ability to tote my kids, without having to strap someone to the trunk, it comes at a steep price.  It instantly zaps all my sex appeal.  It is the place where my sexiness goes to die. I mean, I don’t have to worry about a carload of creepy dudes rolling up alongside of me trying to holler, but short of that, it provides little comfort.  It’s like a magical minivan, that regardless of what I’m… [Read more]