Oct 31

“I sexed more with conversation than I ever did with my penis or my tongue.” – Iceberg Slim If you’ve read any of Robert Beck’s books you will understand why his genius and mastery of words reflect a complex creature that could not be summed up simply as a pimp. His words had a way of putting you in the moment, lulling you into his reality of wire hanger whippings, luxurious hotel rooms, and the drugs of the time that kept him so aloof that he earned the street moniker Iceberg. Pimping is a cruel, evil institution that has been strangely glamorized in Hollywood and music alike, but to say that the mythical pimp (not the real kind) does not hold a certain appeal to damaged young men is to be dishonest or dare I say ignorant to the culture. What is it about a pimp that… [Read more]

Oct 30

I once had a friend of mine (white person) ask me if it would bother me if they showed up to a party in some brown paint to complete their ensemble for a black character they loved and wanted to be for Halloween. I asked them why couldn’t they just be the character without the offensive, extra detail. That was the end of the conversation. I think now of how I would portray a character like Tony Stark the Iron Man, one of the main Marvel Super Heroes that I loved and adored as a kid. I would get my mustache right, grow a junior ‘fro and then carry around a glass of liquor while wearing a glowing arc-reactor under my shirt. No time during my imagination of myself as Stark do I picture myself in the mirror with some makeup, going white to complete… [Read more]

Oct 29

Catcalling, or “hollering at females” is the new target of attack as the continued march against everything male picks up steam on the internet. While I have personally asked the catcallers in our fellowship to stop—since it’s more demeaning to them than helpful—it is still being touted as an “all male” problem, instead of a “certain type of guy” problem. What I’m seeing is that it’s demeaning, it makes women uncomfortable, and it’s annoying UNLESS that guy is someone appealing. Let a 6’5” Boris Kodjoe looking dude with a $1,000 suit on catcall a woman and I bet she wouldn’t be rushing off to complain about it on her blog. It’s like when a celebrity with a big penis gets put on blast for a sex tape or selfie sent to a mistress. You would think that his female fans would be disappointed at his… [Read more]

Oct 28

Have a man in your life that you plan on shopping for this holiday? Chances are you have some things in mind that he will merely raise an eyebrow at while pretending to be happy. See contrary to popular belief, shopping for men is not easy–especially if that man is the successful breadwinner type. We end up with colognes that we barely wear, bad video games that we keep packaged up, and gift packages from websites that still offer up suggestions for 60’s era men (cigars, ties, cufflinks, etc.) The things that the modern man wants are a little bit more abstract than you think and many of them will surprise you. The following list of do’s and don’ts are things that you should consider when shopping for the man in your life. A List of Things We Don’t Want Ties – With the holidays… [Read more]

Oct 25

We’re not only writers; we’re readers and below are some of the highlights of the past few weeks that we wish to share: Sex Question Friday: Why Is Being Single So Stigmatized? As a result of these negative stereotypes, people seem to feel that singlism (the scientific term for prejudice against singles) is justified. In fact, people think it is much more legitimate to discriminate against singles than it is to discriminate against people based upon other personal characteristics (e.g., race, gender, sexual orientation). Consistent with this idea, in one study, participants were asked to evaluate a set of property rental applications and to select they applicant they would prefer to have as a tenant.  (LEHMILLER) Black man’s burden: myth of the deadbeat The question put forth to you today is whether or not this unsubstantiated rumor is true? The answer is a resounding “No!” Not only… [Read more]

Oct 23

If you are a modern gentleman, one of the things that you will stay on top of is your personal appearance and this extends from looks to your living environment. Mess and clutter has been a stereotype of men that goes back a long ways; it reasons that men’s carefree attitude towards life leads us to becoming slobs in need of a woman to help us clean up. Knowing more than a few women that are slobs along with men that keep their pad together, this stereotype is false but many people do struggle with keeping their homes in order. What can you do? Well the number one thing to keep in mind when taking on the discipline of cleaning up, is that it is always better to do things “right now” rather than “later on”. When you wake up, spread your bed “right now”…. [Read more]

Oct 22

As men we aren’t given the luxury of crying, bragging about cyber-stalking our exes, and blaming the patriarchy (well some of you still do this); this does not mean that you have no options. Men find it just as hard to get over an ex as women do but society makes it very hard to express. In the 1996 movie Swingers, Mike played by Jon Favreau portrays a guy that cannot get over his ex, no matter how many strange women, theories and strippers that his friends throw his way. Many of us are wired differently, so while it may be easy for a guy like me to say “get over her and move on”, the truth of the matter is that like Mike, many of you simply can’t. The following list is of some real things that you can do as a man to… [Read more]

Oct 21

Recently I took a ten day vacation out of the country and it was a nice time for all, especially someone like me that never takes a break. The people were friendly, the weather was excellent, and the sea water was pretty damn therapeutic. But there were a few downers and although they weren’t enough to ruin my vacation, it made me think about how I could better plan for the next one. I have had many questions on traveling – especially as a black male and some of you have asked me to share my adventures whenever I embark on them. I hope to start a new series on my thoughts as I take breaks from the monotonous rat race with this article. The following is a list of items, both good and bad that I have learned as a tourist abroad. 1. Tourists… [Read more]