You’ve probably heard the saying don’t blame the player blame the dame, but what kind of boys do you have, if you can’t trust them to leave your girl. I remember the first time I ran into this problem was when I dated a really attractive girl in college. Some of my supposed friends thought it was cool to try and get with her behind my sleeping back, unknowing that she was reporting back to me about every incident. There seems to be two very different opinions on this thing, each placing the brunt of the responsibility on either side. What I mean is we have guys who believe that it’s the ultimate test of their girl’s loyalty if she can suffer the whims of the crowd and then there are guys who believe that their boys should know better, even if their girl is giving them positive feedback when they push up on her. This all goes to show that the majority of males do not abide to the man laws, in our modern, information age of the internet and asexual fashion trends. The man laws clearly state that you should place your friend’s woman in the same category as moms and sisters but we all know that this is hardly respected or practiced.

So there you are being introduced to your man’s new girlfriend and her beauty and sexiness causes you to pause and lose your mind for a few moments. Within your mind you are forced to come to terms with your friendship, but it is all subconscious and the weight of training you have had leading up to manhood comes into play and your ethics will decide your next course of action.  The lawless type of savage, male individual will begin to wonder “how the hell did he pull that?”, will make subtle gestures to try and see if she wants to “upgrade” and will end up trying to get in her panties as soon as he turns his back. The true friend, who has been tried and trued in the man laws will probably acknowledge her beauty, inquire on her friends (or sisters) if he’s shopping around, and will be happy that his boy has found some prime arm candy. For this reason, it is important to know who your friends are and what they are capable of when it comes to women. I will state this and it is something I have grown to live by when it comes to male friends: A friend can take a bullet for you and still turn around and sleep with your girl. A good friend can still be flawed in terms of weakness for women and their wiles.

This is not to infer that females cannot be the aggressor in these situations.  Let’s take a look at the most famous case of this, the tale of King Arthur. As you all know Lancelot was the greatest of all knights. Out of 25 kickass knights in Arthur’s army, Lancelot had armor to rival even the legendary Excalibur (Arthur’s heavenly sword), had the fighting skills to bring down armies and had the looks to take any woman in all the land. Yet one of Lancelot’s strongest traits was his honor and reverence for his king. People barely think of Lancelot as Arthur’s greatest knight, however people remember him for committing the greatest sin with his best friend’s wife. Lancelot slept with Guinevere and severed the trust with his king. The act sent Arthur into a black exile, causing the land and its people to suffer and tarnished Guinevere’s name and honor. In the movie Excalibur they show Lancelot literally fighting himself over the crime and receiving a wound that was cursed to never heal. Guinevere becomes a nun to try and win God’s forgiveness and Arthur becomes hopelessly depressed. Yet at the heart of it all, the encounter began with Lancelot meeting Guinevere for the first time and instantly falling in love with her. Can we be mad at the perfect knight? Guinevere was already married and still chose to have a secret rendezvous with the knight. In modern day terms, you can say that Gwen threw it on him, and if any of us were flushed with passion like Lancelot was, we would do it too. Their mistake, aside from infidelity, was to betray the trust of a mythical king with a magic sword.

So for all of the Lancelot’s out there who meet their friend’s woman and has the Guinevere effect, what can you do? In Excalibur Lancelot stopped showing up to Camelot (Arthur’s castle) unless summoned, stayed out in the wilderness and gave up the luxuries of a knight’s life to hide his feelings. He was a man’s man and his refusal of such a life to stay loyal was an honorable attempt. Guinevere literally had to ride out to the forest and drop trou’ in order for him to lose his mind and have sex with her. See Guinevere had it in bad for Lancelot too and couldn’t will her feelings away the way the knight did. So what was it that Lancelot could have done to keep his honor and prevent the adultery from occurring? He couldn’t have told the king, I know many of us use that argument as a way out of that predicament. You say “just tell your boy that his girl has been flirting with you and you are feeling her”. Not everyone is mature enough to deal with that kind of situation. Some friends may damn near punch you in the mouth or worse yet beat her ass for the accusation. So what can you do? Lancelot tried the “moving away” approach, yet she came and found him. Arthur knew something was bothering his friend, yet he couldn’t get it out of Lancelot’s mouth. What can you do to prevent this situation?

You need to be strong, but we are all prone to making mistakes, even horrible mistakes like screwing your friend’s wife. Infidelity is an unforgivable act that warrants death in some situations. Passion and honor are two things that measure the length of a man and many men don’t take the aspect of losing face easily. Religion cannot prevent it (many preachers are screwing the wives of deacons), fear of death cannot prevent it and even the Man Laws cannot help it. So here is what you, as y own King Arthur can do to help it. Open your eyes, have open communication with your fellows and most importantly, know who your boys are and what they are capable of. In cases of women, I know which friends are true gangsters, sucker for love fools and fakers. The fakers and the sucker for love guys are the ones that will more than likely Lancelot your girl when you are shipped off on active duty for the military, take a job out of town or get locked up. These “friends” may talk a good game, but when your friendly girlfriend, fiancé, or wife seeks them out for comfort, they will stick it in. Know your boys fellas, know your boys.

Had Arthur opened his eyes to the passion and want behind his friend’s eyes when he observed his queen, he would have seen it coming. To have your guard down during the happiest of times, the way the king did was the opportune time to have a heating queen. Know your friends, know their weaknesses and keep your eyes open. I don’t mean to be a jealous fool who handcuffs his woman out of insecurity but at the same time you cannot make yourself blind either. Remember, if you find yourself wondering, did Billy just flirt with my girl in front of me? Remember Lancelot, Arthur’s greatest knight, if he could sleep with Guinevere then Billy will hit your girl.

Related Posts:

1. Being Singled Out by Married Friends?
2. Love Me Or Leave Me Alone – Pt. 2
3. The Downside to Hook-Ups
4. Show Her Some Love on Valentine’s Day
5. How To Tell if Your Girlfriend’s a Bitch

Written by Greg Dragon on Wednesday, September 16, 2009 
Filed under Married Life, Relationships, The Code of Man, The Dating Game · Tagged with cheating, friends, girlfriend, infidelity, internet, trust lancelot effect