As you know, I am a big backer for online dating. In this cyber age of 9 to 5 jobs, side hustles and responsibilities, it gets tough for a single guy to break routine and go fishing for booty. And who do you have pushing you to date? Your married friends (who probably got hitched young thus having zero experience in the dating field), your hen pecking mom and probably a nosy co-worker or two. Maybe you just got lonely, you start realizing that you are constantly the 5th wheel when you hangout with friends and it begins to bother you.

So you try the traditional means, you hit up a loud, nasty club/bar where some drunk, loser chick either ends up wasting your time or giving you her number – or the ass if she likes  you enough (don’t you love how I say this like it’s easy). If the club fails you could always go join some Christian church and do the Singles Meeting angle . Most churches i’ve attended had this ministry, meant to unite two single people towards marriage. For the opportunist, I am sure you can see the convenience of something like this. Finally there is the worst kind of “old fashioned” method that you can try which is the dreaded “hook up”. This is where a person pushes their female buddy (who probably has man issues) into a blind date with you. You will be told that your date is a “cute girl” and she will be told that you have a good job, and are a “nice guy”.

Old fashioned dating methods are for movies and soap operas
With the traditional methods you will have to make quite a bit of effort to knock the ball out of the park. That is unless the blind date finds you irresistible, then you can probably get going on a few things almost immediately. If you are a bible beater, the second method of the church’s singles meeting will probably be golden. The club route… psssh forget about it, if you dislike swapping looks with douche bags bumping into you and trying to start shit in a half drunk stupor, this method is hell. This isn’t even touching on the loud music making conversation minimal, the fact that 70% of the women there are either with their man or just trying to dance without hooking up. Then we go back to your hectic schedule, limited hang out time and low tolerance for bull. If you are at this point, you may want to try your hand at online dating.

Online Dating isn’t a dating simulation
I swear when I look at the hundreds of “Online Dating sucks!” blogs all over the web it’s always the same types of people posting them. These people have either had no success with it, got scarred by a faker or hypothetically made up date stories just to prove their bitter point. Here is the thing, if you are a douche your profile, unless written by someone else will reflect your douche personality. If you take the time to write a good, funny introduction to yourself without bragging about your money or bulging muscles, you are guaranteed a few winks from potential admirers. Now if you use your friend’s pic to put on your profile (this blows my mind that a guy would put another man’s face in his stead but whatever), place your salary as six figures and brag about banging weights 3 times a week, you may attract a few spelunkers who are on their trying to score with that fantasy you put out there. I really don’t sympathize with women like this but since you’re both assholes, you deserve one another.

The uneven playing field of Online Dating – what Match.com/e-Harmony won’t tell you
Okay fellas here’s the secret that no-one tells you up front. Now before I go into this, I don’t want to scare you away from Online Dating but I want you to be aware. When you sign unto these sites, you are shown hundreds of beautiful women of varying cultures, nationalities and sizes. It is a huge gumbo of sexiness and it hits you and overwhelms you with “what can be” and all of that illusionist nonsense. You’ll lose your mind and go crazy sending emails, winks and nudges to every fine woman you can see within your 20 mile radius… stats be damned, that chick is fine! That’s what will dominate your mind. Well… the thing is this Romeo, see while you are sending out that pimping ass email of how you can give her the world, there are hundreds of other guys just like you gassing her balloon shaped ego with the same drivel. You are competing against hundreds of other emails while she has to compete against only a handful.

The scales are not measured equally. Women get tons of emails from hundreds of guys while you will be lucky to get one. There, the secret is out, you and 1,000 other single (or dirty married) men are chasing a pool of maybe 200 women. I bet you think I’m lying right? Well don’t get discouraged, get real. The good news is that about 90% of the other guys are not suave, they type  typical loser, duck crap that gets deleted from her inbox as soon as she sees the subject. Another 5% are master sharks, romancing these women out of their panties for the old “hit it and quit it” and the remaining 5% are either plants or bots spamming the sale of penile erectile pills or whatever. If you have even a smidgen of Game, online dating will do well by you. There will be ladies winking at you, dropping you phone numbers, meeting you, kissing on you and fitting neatly between your scheduled “free time”. Sounds lovely right?

Don’t get it twisted – Race Does Matter
Unless you are white and banking six figures legitimately, make sure you narrow your searches to women who list your race as a preference. I might catch some heat for this but I’m doing this for the boys, you all are gonna appreciate me for laying it out like this. Black men and Asian men if you’re going for an interracial hookup, make sure she posts that she is down before you waste your time on her. There is a common preference with online dating and you are not it. Latinos do okay but blacks and Asians you need to fish in the ponds that will bite. It is absolutely heartbreaking to see a woman that you think is beyond fine, figure that she’s down (especially if she’s a woman of color herself) and shoot her an email professing your love, only to see that she wants nothing to do with you – because of your color. Nothing racial (well it kinda is) but that’s her preference. You wasted an email on this bitch, not fun is it? Just remember to read first fellas, read first, there are a handful of girls on there who are feeling you, you just have to avoid the traps on your way to them. This is not an excuse to write-off all women who look like the one with the “white fetish”, you just have to shop wisely.

What I used to do to avoid this trap was to shoot for the girls that looked like me (race-wise) but leave my options open for the women who searched for guys that looked like me. I know it sounds like I had a limited choice doing this, but on the contrary – my winks, dates and connections came from all walks of life. For the girls who wrote me off after my race didn’t match their preference, we never bumped heads due to this strategy. No harm, no foul.

Avoid women with only head shots and less than 3 images
If you want to keep your sanity and avoid porn baiters, BBWs (unless that’s your thing) and traps, you will stick to the general rule here. Do not ever assume when it comes to online dating because more often than none you will be scarred. If it seems shady, then it is shady, keep on moving. The experience of sharing many a phone call, email and flirty trade-offs with someone who you meet for the first date and realize looks nothing like you “assumed” can be devastating.

So don’t be dissuaded by the bitter bitch blogs of the internet telling you how online dating sucks. It is merely another avenue of hooking up that is a bit more convenient than the traditional. Use it as a tool and make sure to be interesting, as in anything you are selling yourself in this online competition for an attractive female. If anything, Online Dating is a good testing grounds for newbies in the dating game and prime hunting for veterans who know how to seal the deal. Get your feet wet and have a little bit of fun. Happy hunting!

Written by Greg Dragon on Tuesday, October 27, 2009 

Filed under The Dating Game
Tagged with asian, assholes, black men, fetish, nice guys, online dating