I recently read an article “Three Things Man Crave Daily From Women” and starting to read this, I was ready to be defense or take some kind umbrage with the content, but I was pleasantly surprised and would only make one additional suggestion to the content – that women would want the same things. The article discusses three things that you can do within your relationship that will keep men tuned into their relationship; maintained affection and desire, loyalty and showing appreciation. Through reading the article I can see that these things are likely to affect men and women differently but they are important across the board. For men, showing affection and desire is the key to allowing men to not only feel attractive to their partner, but to be a visual display that they are connected to their partner. Anyone who is a visual learner would likely benefit from physical touch. For women, the… [Read more]

Many people want to wear the “hustler” label because it sounds cool and all of the ex-drug dealers who rap are making it out to be the essence of manhood. The truth of the matter is that many so-called hustlers (especially self-proclaimed hustlers) are just wannabes, busy-bodies, or small time businessmen who hustle backwards. To be a hustler you have to do exactly what the definition says – you have to be “about it”, on your game, and seize the moment whenever it presents itself. hus.tle (hus.tled | hus. tling): a : to obtain by energetic activity <hustle up new customers> b : to sell something to or obtain something from by energetic and especially underhanded activity <hustling the suckers> c : to sell or promote energetically and aggressively<hustling a new product> d : to lure less skillful players into competing against oneself at (a gambling game) <hustle pool> If you find that you have… [Read more]

Do you ever wonder why it is that “Nice Guys” never seem to do well with the opposite sex? Could it be the old accurate stereotype of women wanting jerks when they’re young and then nice guys when they’re riddled with baggage and almost too old to conceive? I have had the pleasure of meeting a lot of guys who read the site and find some of my advice useful in their daily lives, but one of the questions I get asked a lot is how you stop being a Nice Guy, or how do you convince someone that you are much more than the label. Well the first thing you have to realize is that you’re owning a label that is bringing you down. The word nice brings about the illusion of “good”, or “moral” but in reality it is a negative that is a euphemism for “boring” and “pushover”. There’s Nothing Nice about… [Read more]

Yesterday, Greg Dragon wrote an article about silencing those of us who rant on social media by sharing their “thanks Mom for playing Dad” stories. As an advocate for child abuse survivors and non-conformists everywhere, I beg to disagree with his varying thoughts on this. He states that those who rant on Father’s day are bitter and want to mess up the holiday for everyone else and that the rants are merely haters who like to male bash. He does his best to dissuade those of us from alternative backgrounds by offering a thunderous round of applause for parents forced to assume both roles. I am left wondering where their national holiday is. I often wonder why child abuse survivors must hide their disdain for the parents who got it wrong and why they should be ridiculed for choosing to celebrate the one that got it right on Mother’s or Father’s Day. In many ways… [Read more]

In a couple of days your Facebook timelines, Twitter feeds and G+ homes will be littered with all sorts of appreciation grams for the fathers of your friends, family and associates. It will be a day of people expressing appreciation to dad on social media (who probably won’t be able to read it) so that everyone subscribed will see that he/she writing is an appreciative child. – if you sense a slightly annoyed tone in my writing… it is intended – Unfortunately this day that should be a celebration of fatherhood (read: MALE fatherhood) will be a time for opportunistic, bitter bastards (like myself #teamnodad) to post snarky-grams disguised as appreciation for our single mothers who “played both roles”. There will be people that were hurt as children taking the opportunity to garner pity from the masses or even worse lob bombs at those who are feeling too good. Father’s Day, like Mother’s Day will… [Read more]

Most people when entering the job market are ignorant as to what job or career they should pursue, they hear from parents and teachers that careers are chosen either for money or for passion. The problem with the passion approach however, is that it does not always mean success. It’s like anything else; you may be passionate about swimming, but this does not mean you will end up getting sponsorships like Michael Phelps. In addition to this reality – do you want to risk the chance at becoming frustrated or tired of your passion if it winds up being long hours for little to no reward? It is quite normal to have some difficulty in deciding one’s path career-wise, many people who rush it, or do what they believe to be their calling choose the wrong career. We have found that the best way to consider a career is to balance something that you like… [Read more]

Many women have asked if sex can be enough to keep a man around. Not just quantity of sessions for the guy with a ravenous appetite mind you but mind-blowing, curl your toes and knock your socks off sex. Is it enough to keep a man from flying off course in a relationship? Is it enough for a woman to be readily available for her guy (whenever she can), or is it still not the answer to the question of infidelity? I can only speak for myself and the men that I have known but with most guys who “creep”, the reasoning isn’t always for lack of sexy time with the misses. Many guys, especially young guys have their eyes, noses, and minds open to sexy, built women – the more the merrier. So the quantity in question then becomes one of “people” not so much sexual encounters. If a horny man can hop unto… [Read more]

Although efforts to ameliorate the lives of young Black males have been primarily led by adults, it’s time tap into the power of having young Black males to mentor other young Black males. In my experience working with and mentoring young Black middle to college males from across the nation, I have found that giving Black males around the same age the opportunity to support one another delivers impressive results. While many adults may not be ready to begin to think about partnering with the youth to improve mentoring efforts, they will find that numerous young people will be willing to listen to other young people much more than they will be willing to listen to adults. In no way am I suggesting that Black adults should turn the important task of mentoring Black male youths completely over to young Black males; however, I posit that young Black males can be meaningful partners in mentoring… [Read more]