Dec 01

Why spend a mint on a huge wedding only to lead a life of hard grinding, a debt ceiling that is as tall as a cathedral and an unhappy wife/husband bitching about money? Now as your friend and/or family member we have to hear you complain about your financial situation and how hard it is to keep up… yet you have a double income coming in. Why didn’t you think of this before showing up everyone with your 6-figure wedding bash? How is it impressing people if they already know that you’re about to spend 10+ years in the trenches struggling and putting strain on your marriage by working a way out of the hole that you’ve put yourself in?

Recently I went to the wedding of a good friend of mine and it was small, intimate and very cost-effective. The couple love and understand one another to the point that they worked hard to save up for the wedding, knocked it out and are honeymooning with the peace of mind that they have entered a life together without that gorilla on their shoulders of paying off the wedding.

It’s Not Our Fault It’s Our Damn Parents

Many times it isn’t the fault of the newlyweds that their wedding is ridiculous in cost. It’s Mommy Dearest and Aunt Myrtle that wants you to have the type of wedding that they’ve always wanted and put the pressure on you and yours to have it done. Ladies if you are cool with a smaller inexpensive wedding THIS is the time to let Bridezilla feed and get these hens out of your business stat! Easier said than done I know, but is working double shifts and unnecessary financial strain on your marriage worth it? Of course not. Cuss these women out and send them an apology note after the Honeymoon. Consider the future.

What if Our Parents Are Paying For It?

Unless they are paying for all of it then I would say stick to your guns and don’t let them jack up your bill just because they agreed to several thousand. Nowadays our parents are even more broke than we are so unless you are not the one kicking in your hard-earned for the wedding, tell them to slow down a bit on the craziness.

A buddy of mine did everything he could to make his family happy by burning money on a wedding to make it into a family reunion of some kind and a divorce and another wedding later he is still paying for it. I can bet that he regrets doing it despite seeing everyone together for the first time. You need to think logically.

Consider Demanding Money Instead of Gifts From Guests

I went to one wedding like this and I thought that the idea was brilliant. Everyone giving envelopes to the bride and groom was so damn gangster and you never know when rich Uncle Bernie’s going to feel generous and drop several grrr on your nuptials, thus paying for everything and then some. Why get a lame toaster and some silverware when you can get some help on your pricey wedding?

Think about it and most importantly make sure your partner is on the same page as you about it. Most couples that really want to save themselves from money, drama and disappointment, tend to elope and celebrate afterwards. At the end of the day you need to do what will make you happy at your wedding, after your wedding and for the rest of your married life.

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  • DP

    Haha, this sounds good on paper but women of color might not be feeling it.