This was the feedback I received from a number of black women when I wrote a guest post about the positives in dating a tomboy. The women who responded seemed to come from 3 separate camps – those who genuinely liked the article, former tomboys who appreciated the article, and religious bigots who wanted to spin it into a “gays are running our Christian earth” type of thing.
Here’s a quote from one of the responses that took my sexuality to task:
Jo: “sooo, are you saying you’re bi or something? I’m sorry, but if you like a girl who acts like a man, hates other girls (or pretends that other girls except herself are “catty” is a HUGE sign of ugly insecurity and hypocrisy), likes beer and football and farting, well, guess what? You dont like a girl, you like a guy.”
Thank goodness there were some sane folks in the commentary, one being from “Meg” who replied:
Meg: “Wow. That’s some straight ignorant BS right there. I’m a full-out tomboy and although I may try to be girly for nights out or dates, you can tell just in the way I act that I am no priss. I box, run, play football and hate shopping. That being said, the idea of being a lesbian repulses me. I am in no way attracted to women and in fact, I think many straight tomboys can’t STAND women and that’s why they hang out with men. That’s that narrow mindedness that puts people back 100 years in common sense and respect for others.”
You may wonder why I bring Church into the argument of this article but the people who attacked my post had a religious spin on other posts that I had followed – so I knew the animal behind the attacks (so to speak).
Due to the fact that I am beyond secure in my sexuality (and could give a damn what a commenter reads into any of my articles to determine what I like), the attacks didn’t really phase me. But it made me curious as to how widespread is this belief that girls who play sports, dress down and hang with mostly boys are secretly gay and the boys who date them are gay along with them. I am ready to laugh just writing this drivel.
I would love to hear from anyone out there reading, who is brave enough to defend the scriptures of Leviticus and take me to task for liking women who are defined as “sporty”. Am I one of the “freaky minority” for giving the Gina Carano’s in life their props for doing boy things while looking good at the same time? Or is it the way I am seeing it – Another religious persecution borne from homophobia, short-sightedness and backwards, church dogma?
Am I going in too hard for you? Well the fact that I am somehow being called gay for liking… women… leads me to want a real answer to what I see as a silly assertion. What’s Jo’s problem with men liking tomboys in your opinion, if you aren’t in agreement with her? I am going to go with a tomboy may have kicked her ass in the past.See some words or phrases that you don't understand? Check out The Dragon's Lexicon.