May 22
lady gaga felt up

Last Saturday I went to dinner with a friend, and saw a reality show celebrity in the company of her husband, son, and another male at dinner. My dinner company was the first to recognize the son, and when I turned around I saw the familiar short, blond hair cut of the woman. I was amazed at how quickly my girl recognized them, and I had to admit this moment would have easily passed me had I been alone. Am I that unaware? Most importantly, I had no desire to “meet” her, and even as I walked past her table I had absolutely no urge to “holler” at her in the typical ways fans do. This led to a conversation with my friend who shared that another individual who is big in the game was highly insulted when Jasmine Guy did not acknowledge him as… [Read more]

Mar 06

Have you ever tried to borrow money and got turned down? How did that make you feel? Mad? Disappointed? Frustrated? Belittled? You might not agree, but that person just did you a huge favor. What do I mean? Well, if you are borrowing money to make a purchase or to pay a bill, borrowing is not the proactive solution. It is much like digging a hole on the left to fill the one the right. Trust me, you will never get ahead that way. I know it’s tough, and borrowing often seems like the best short-term solution. We often borrow with the best intention to pay back right away, but life happens and resentment and avoidance becomes the name of the game. Have you ever done the credit card shuffle where one credit card is used to pay the other, or transferring balances to new… [Read more]

Feb 16

Are you a great listener to friends and coworkers as they unburden their problems on you? Do you find yourself the one who always know the right thing to say, full of nuggets of wisdom and advice? Be careful, this will fast become your part-time job. Often times it boils down to a single individual complaining about a boss, a partner, or some other personal matter, and it is not uncommon to find your posture changed from listening passively, to participating actively by literally being the shoulder to cry on, and the arms to provide comfort. But it never stops there, and eventually, sex – the great pacifier and purported healer is added to the mix. Unfortunately, this is the modus operandi of most cheaters. Biggest in the game is the married person who puts it up front that “yes I am married, but….” Once… [Read more]

Feb 08

Have you ever come across a card that spoke so profoundly to an occasion or person that you are just stunned with disbelief? It’s as if the writer sat with you and you poured your heart out, and BAM!! There’s your precise feelings all summed up in prose. I am a sucker for cards. They are affordable, portable, and travel well. I have received cards over the years that I continue to hold on to them due to their impactful words. Many are typical, while others are short and sweet, and leave me wondering – how the hell did he/she find this? For instance, one card from my honey that still has me looking forward to each day says: Take my hand and walk with me From where we are to where we’ll be Love is a mystery We will learn what life is as… [Read more]

Jan 23

I am an avid listener of the Steve Harvey Morning Show, and especially of the Strawberry Letter – an email letter format for listeners who seek advice. The majority of the advice sought is about love and relationships, and to a lesser extent other family situations. These letters run the gamut of serious enough for a referral for professional intervention, to downright trifling, repetitive, and stupid! Ooops! Did I say that? Anyway, recently Steve and his cohost Shirley (last name Strawberry) received a letter from a woman who stated she was in a relationship with a married man. She suggested to him for his wife to join them in a threesome (every man’s fantasy right???). After some hesitation on the part of Mr. and Mrs. Down For Anything, this ménage trois was on and popping. This fantastic instigator claims that her lover’s wife is now… [Read more]

Jan 17

Long distance relationships are tricky and take quite a bit of navigating as you work your way through knowing a person and building a memory bank. For those of us who have our lover just around the corner who we see practically every day, knows the challenges we face and will agree that long distance relationships are not for the feint of heart and the insecure. When you are in a long distance relationship, you tend to depend on different means of contact as a measure of the health of your relationship. When you don’t hear from your sweetie, you might resort to second-guessing yourself by asking, “Is he thinking about me?” “Is someone else siphoning her affection?” Many times these shadowy bits of our imagination are dispelled by the next call or visit, and in some cases may open up a keg of insecurity… [Read more]

Jan 11

Among the many new years resolution we all make, the typical ones include  weight-loss, exercise, beginning a new project, saving more… you name it. Somehow many of us have never include ways to improve our mental health. Mental Health? What the hell are you talking about Dr. Carly? Well… did you know that 1 out of every 4 persons living in the U.S. has some type of mental health disorder? They run the gamut from mild to severe, but that is not what I really want to call your attention to. Did you realize that both good and bad moods are infectious?  Yes! The fact is our mood and emotions are easily affected by others; especially those we are closest to.  Think back, have you ever been in a great mood and then met up with your honey/parent/friend/co-worker who was in a major funk? All… [Read more]

Jan 05

Now that I have experienced what it is to have a “failed marriage”, I often wonder why I am still hopeful about getting married again, and making it work. With the high rates of divorce and broken relationships, heightened by the recent debacle of Kim Kardashian, it is so easy to become cynical about “I dos”. Everybody has a personal rule as to what assures success or sure failure in marriage. I have heard advice ranging from “live with the person for at lest year, as in a trial run”, to the other side that says “If you shack up, your marriage is guaranteed to fail”.  There are also those who counsel – “Make sure you get to “know” the person. Date for at least one to three years”; yet I have a friend who got married two weeks meeting her husband, and in June… [Read more]