Is marriage the gold standard that all couples are meant to reach in their relationship? If we do not have a diamond ring and wedding bands circling the third finger of our left hand, a home with a picket fence and children are we missing the mark somehow? Speaking strictly from my own experiences of dating, love and marriage – I don’t think so. Some research has shown that cohabitation is a sort of illusion of a trial marriage type of thing. And that is only correct if we are assuming that marriage is the end goal. And also assuming that marriage equals commitment; and sadly to say that when we have a human factor involved – there is no guaranteed commitment. To be clear, I am not anti-marriage but I am also not pro-marriage; I am in a committed relationship with my partner and we are cohabitating prior to our engagement. According to research… [Read more]

Our generation of men has possibly become the torch bearers for the bachelor way of life. Our emotions regarding relationships are not excessively unfavorable or even optimistic since we view marriage as one of a couple living options in the future. For many years in this country, women were treated like 2nd class citizens; they weren’t allowed to leave their parent’s houses until they were married and to get married they had to be courted. Women had to rely on a husband to take care of the finances while she took care of the children and home. Well now times have changed and many women are making just as much or more than men. Women no longer need a man to survive People can take care of themselves now and don’t need to partner up with someone to get through the tough times. This has led to women marrying at older ages than in the past, and… [Read more]

Shame on me for reading an article on marriage from the king of conservative websites, but my curiosity led me over to Fox News to read Steven Crowder’s A man’s top 5 reasons to grow up and get married. Expecting a solid piece giving new energy to the notion of marriage, I instead got an offensive piece of Beta man garbage rife with insults at any man who didn’t fit into the married club. The narrative was one of fairy-tale fantasy that directly contradicted the realistic view that intelligent married couples have been trying to present in the last few years. The pragmatic married couple who single folks respect will tell you that marriage takes work, it takes sacrifice, and the rewards may not always be worth the effort. The people who argue for marriage will tell you that for all the hard times you will have the perk of partnership along with other glorious… [Read more]

When my best friend Phil asked his lady Bridget to marry him and she said yes, he was absolutely beaming with excitement. Come four months later though, his ear-to-ear grin had been replaced by a stiff, resolute scowl. What had happened? His sassy, quirky fiancé had been transformed into the dreaded, stereotypical bridezilla. Worse, he was bearing much of the brunt of her unrestrained crazy; if he tried to help with the planning process, he was “in the way” but if he did nothing then she deemed him “unappreciative and indifferent towards their marriage.” When the day of their wedding actually arrived, he was just as happy that there would be an end to the emotional, frantic insanity as he was to actually be marrying the woman. So, when I asked my fiancé, Amanda, to marry me two years later, I was determined to learn from his mistakes. 1. Volunteer to Assist The first thing… [Read more]

What would you do if you met the woman of your dreams; married her; had sex with her often; then one day she begins to cheat and skip out on you before letting you know that she was born a man? Stop me if you’ve heard this one before because it seems like I have – at least something similar. According to The Telegraph, a Belgian man is looking to get his 19 year marriage annulled after finding out that his Indonesian wife was born a boy who later got a sex change: The man, only named as Jan, married Monica, his family’s former au pair in a previous marriage, in 1993 despite legal difficulties raised by the Belgian immigration authorities. But it was only in recent weeks that he discovered that his wife had originally been a man and had undergone a sex change. “I feel I’ve been assaulted,” he told the Het Nieuwsblad newspaper. “I brought… [Read more]

I recently spoke with a good friend that I have been out of contact with for some time. In the first few conversations I was asked the question that irks me beyond words. “Why don’t you want any kids?” I absolutely HATE when people ask me this question because it implies that I should have kids. And Why? Why is it that only women get asked these dumb ass questions? I don’t hear of people asking men about children. Is that what women my age are supposed do? Is it because traditionally women should be the ones crazy about children? Because all humans (specifically women) need to reproduce? Well screw all that!!! I live for me and beyond other people’s expectations. Why couldn’t she have asked me about school or work? Or how about my life goals or hell ask me about my health. But no, the first thing you think of is about some… [Read more]

I hear married men announce “wife points” almost on a daily basis: “man I’m gonna lose wife points for this”; “I got some wife points the other day for that”. Yet we unmarried guys look on and nod as if we understand the terminology but in reality we are simply translating wife points into what we know from “girlfriend points”. I’m going to go out on a limb and say that the 2 point systems are different based on the level of fear I see in a married man’s eyes whenever he knows that he’s about to lose wife points. This led me to ask a married man the following question: “are men regulated to being children to their wives. How come there are no husband points?” His answer: “Because we don’t give a damn! If your girl pisses you off for some reason, you handle that crap right there and then. You don’t hold… [Read more]

Years ago whenever I would hear my son declare “ I am bored!” I would cringe. They would even critique certain events, movies etc.  as “B-O-R-I-N-G” and I knew that was a definite thumb’s down. Right on cue I can remember my mothers favorite mantra,“The devil finds work for idle hands to do!”” Huuuuuuh! So with all these memories swirling in my mind, the year I took my two sons and two of their friends to Jamaica for a week’s vacation, I was hell bent on keeping four pairs of hands and feet so busy having fun, I would never hear the dreaded words, “I am bored!” and I did! Sadly, this malady is not limited to teenagers. So many of us as adults are bitten with the bored bug and its symptoms spill over into us being bored with life, bored with the job, bored with the car, bored with the gym, bored with… [Read more]