Jan 22

woman-being-stalked

There is a broad line between stalking and courting. Stalking cannot be mistaken as anything else whereas courtship is still up for debate on it’s definition in today’s world. Many men that stalk would have you believe that they are “courting” but let us put a full stop on that right now. When it comes to talking up a woman you have to learn to be a knife, your surface being smooth and refined, your edge being absolutely deadly.  While stalking a chick may yield firm results from a woman who wants to be heavily chased, most women will want to kill you.

If you want to get over your infatuation, make sure you do it in a healthy way. It saddens me to see guys having restraining orders slapped against them or women having to purchase handguns because some fool crossed the line. Lust like that has toppled nations in history and when a man has picked up the scent of an irresistible woman sometimes it does take a bullet to put him back in pocket. But seriously women, stop enabling this crap, tell the guy that you are 100% not interested and cut it off from jump. If you choose to play with fire by keeping him at arm’s reach then don’t be surprised when he’s at your window watching you sleep at night.

Stalking is not Courting

There will be many married men whose wives will tell you “he kept bugging me until I gave in”. That was the result of a hunt, court, and lock situation. She played the coy female, he played the persistent lover and it paid off well for him in the end. Most of these marriages last a long time, hell your grandma probably told you that story. But that was a time period when the roles were clearly defined and a guy had to chase a woman in order to show genuine interest. Sylvester Stallone in the movies F.I.S.T. and Rocky exemplified the old school chase and court scenario. He would ask the lady out, walk her home and stay in her face until she finally gave him a chance and the resulting love was fierce. Nowadays if a guy is into a girl hard enough to do this and she isn’t feeling him he will be killed or arrested. If the woman won’t meet you halfway with some sort of signal to show interest then get a clue and move on.

If you’re having a hard time differentiating persistence and stalking, here are a few scenarios that could be seen as stalking:

  • You’ve had one bad date with a girl you met online, she told you that she doesn’t feel any chemistry with you and it won’t work out. You send her a friend request on facebook and persist to commenting on how fine she is in all her pics, calling every other week to see if she wants to go out…
  • You met a chick in the Club, got the number and have tried for a month to get her to go out with you. She is always busy or unavailable. You know she works at the mall so you show up at her job to try…
  • You and your girlfriend break up due to an unforgivable offense (you had sex with her mom), you send candy, roses etc. no response, you call her up she doesn’t answer, you wait outside her house…
  • Your ex changes her number and email to get away from you, you get the new number from her friend even after she tells you that she wants nothing to do with you…

It’s all about self-respect and confidence and if you lack self-respect then you will look like that dude outside the sleeping woman’s window touching himself. Nobody likes to be stalked, like I said it’s not the same as persistent courting, get a clue and cut this stuff out. If a woman doesn’t want you then move on and find another, if you find yourself smitten then take care to respect her space. But don’t pretend it’s courtship because it isn’t!

(This original Feb 17, 2010 article by Greg Dragon has been revised and republished)

See some words or phrases that you don't understand? Check out The Dragon's Lexicon.