Is it realistic to “date” a married man? I don’t mean the dude who has moved out on his own and is just waiting for the ink to dry on his divorce papers. I mean the dude who goes home to his wife after he is through hugged up with you! And you know for the few that has “worked out”, it is like counting the number of people you personally know that have won the lottery. For me? That is zero!
A friend of mine had her heart serious broken recently, because her boyfriend went on vacation with his wife!!! Get freakin’ real. You are trying to carry water in a basket! What is the purpose of asking who is she? What’s her name? Why are you still with her? Where are we going… While you are creeping?
Some women see an advantage in dating a married man, because she doesn’t have to do any of the domesticated things such as the cooking, washing, and cleaning. She is the princess that gets taken out to secluded restaurants, clandestine trips, gifts, words of endearment etc. all in return for letting his eyes roll to the back of his head, while she spuriously drives home the message – “I am better than your wife!” Every encounter is an adventure with none of the boredom or predictability of marriage. This is the self-serving woman who puts things in her purse-pective – “what you can do for me now”. She is NOT interested in the fluidity or conformity of water. Her basket is to catch those tangible goodies and it works just fine.
So, if you are trying to date a married man, you need to wake up and have a serious conversation with yourself. Here are some questions to get you started.
- Really and truly, what are your expectations? Can you squeeze a grape and get apple juice?
- What if the shoe were on the other foot? If you do become his wife, what will prevent him from doing the same to you?
- Can you truly trust him?
- Where is your self-esteem in all of this? What do you deserve?
- If your fists are closed trying to hold onto water, how will you grab hold of a real opportunity when it comes by?
Holding on to a promise that will never be fulfilled, is like a thirsty man carrying a basket to the river to fetch water!!See some words or phrases that you don't understand? Check out The Dragon's Lexicon.