“Dear Dragon, I don’t want to sound conceited but why do so many men seem to either feel or be intimidated by me?” – Haseena.Z
Well Haseena, what you suffer from my dear is The Curse of Being A Beautiful Woman – don’t deny your looks for fear of conceit, if you have it going on then you have it going on. Let’s break it down starting with the obvious, you are a beautiful woman so immediately from the jump you will scare away half the guys who secretly can’t get enough of you. Men are strong naturally, but when it comes to women, an inexperienced guy always fears being that dude who is shot down by the beauty in an embarrassing way. I need to figure out a way that a beautiful woman can signal to us guys that she is safe to approach (I know lol) and that even if she is not interested, she will not go off and embarrass the hell out of us. Although this rarely happens, the one loud, crazy chick that we have all met at one time, scares the crap out of guys for some reason.
If it were me, and I saw you and was really into you, I would approach you and anything short of you emasculating me loudly in public would not really deter me from at least trying to get to know you. This fact about myself is due to the tons of rejection I have gone through from High school on up – which is why I always tell guys to keep trying because rejection builds character and kills fear. Most guys are afraid, that’s just the truth of the matter.
Now you, you seem to be confident and pretty sure in your step and that makes you even more intimidating because of another thing. No matter how little a woman has, most guys try to size themselves up to her and the chance of them approaching her is based on what they think they have to offer. A beautiful woman, who is financially savvy and strongly opinionated = too perfect. This is why you see many girls that aren’t so cute and have nothing going for them being snatched up in droves, guys with low self-esteem feel that they deserve can handle women like that… at least in their minds.
The best guys need more than a hint or a smile
So you are going to have it tough with guys, it’s the nature of the beast. It’s like a scale that we are measured on and when you have too much it is at the loss of something else, us guys are flawed in our thinking and if a guy doesn’t feel that he is rich, he damn sure doesn’t think that he deserves a beautiful woman.
There’s hope though, while you may not like it. You basically have your pick of men, whether you want to believe it or not. Guys are much easier once you get past the shyness or the stupid antics used to hide shyness and you can go out and grab one and he’d play ball with the quickness. Most women don’t want to be the hunter though because it seems out of place and not the way of things, but sometimes the best guys need more than a hint or a smile to let them know that you are into them. Sometimes a man has to be told… sadly.
There is a term for it: Caligynephobia: The fear of beautiful women… it’s a real thing.See some words or phrases that you don't understand? Check out The Dragon's Lexicon.