Aug 16


Despite my reluctance to title this article with such a polarizing and subjective word as “good” the content that I am writing about basically requires it. Ideas about what a “good girl” is and what it requires to be a good girl are so rooted in our upbringing, our culture and the times that we are living in.

In an article I read about Good Girls in the New Millennium there is a girl that is described as a “good girl”, she is a 28 year old Hispanic woman that waited until after college to have sex for the first time since she was trying to protect herself from an unplanned pregnancy. The story continues with the outcome of when a smart, educated woman finally does have sex, she contracts gonorrhea from one partner and then genital warts from another.

Alicia felt stuck—she’d done “the right thing” but had been hurt and was left without a relationship that might lead to a traditional family. Good-girl handbooks such as The Rules might advise her to stay the course—delay sex, don’t let on how much she cared about a relationship—and she’d be both safe and on her way to a traditional family. But the rules of old no longer apply in the world that Alicia and her peers occupy. – (PSYCHTODAY)

On a personal level, I feel really bad for this girl – er woman. But as a girl who has made it into her 30’s without a child – planned or otherwise – I would question and maybe take some umbrage with the idea that being a good girl is what got this young lady scratching below the waist. Being a pushover is what got her the clap and genital warts. Being a pushover and being stupid are definitely some high contributing factors in this case.

People in relationships do stupid things. You think the relationship is going to stand the test of time and think that “so and so would never put in me in danger…” that is a stupid thought. Bottom line, get tested, use birth control – take control of not only your educational life, but also your sex life. It’s more than naïve to simply not use birth control because they love you? Because they said they’ve never had unprotected sex before? Come on!

Good girl, bad girl – whatever. Don’t mistreat yourself that way. Good boy, bad boy – I don’t care! Talk about your sex stuff, be honest and be safe. It’s simply stupid to NOT do that. 

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