I have but one question… why are you there?
Recently in my life I have been lucky with being in the presence of many young people who are the product of single-parent homes. Having come from that myself I recall the day I swore that I would not be one of these men who neglect the child(ren) of the woman who happens to be my mate. You would think that men would accept that a woman with child is a package for love but this is not the case at all.
Many men will get deep into relationships with women only to neglect the child, hate the child, abuse, molest, and any number of things that will blow your mind. Why even get in the relationship if loving a child that isn’t of your blood is beyond you as a human being?
A few years ago I wrote an article about how men should go about dating women with children. One of the better comments on the article was from our own Dr. Carly who shared her personal experience with a husband who hated her son (for no other reason but him not being his own) and I felt it necessary to share it:
He Will Never Call Me Dad
When I first got married I was already a mother, as you can imagine my husband was not very good with this and made me feel like damaged property, to whom he was being a saint by marrying and making me honest.
As much as I loved my then-child I won’t pretend that I was proud to be in this situation. The future held so much promise for me but this “shame” of young, single parenthood was never forgotten due to my own mother. Still it was her love and support, which allowed my child to be taken care of, in order for me to finish my education and much more.
When I met my husband he fell in love with me but not my child, actually when I introduced them, the words he uttered were along the lines of, “I told myself that I would never date a woman with a kid, but I will make an exception for you…” Wow, if it were now I would tell him to kiss my butt, but I was still young and my naiveté made me go for him.
This simple declaration was a sign of the hell to come; this man reminded me often that my child would never be his. He planned on having my son call him “Mr.” instead of dad whenever he was old enough to speak. The marriage and experience was hell, but it woke me up to reality and I became extremely strong for it… (Source)
Planning To Be An Asshole? Then Don’t Date Women With Kids
This story and many like it are the beginnings of a life of hardship for our boys. As men we have to accept that we can be our own worst enemies starting from the way we treat children up into the way we treat one another.
My broken past did not make me into a thug or a woman-hater like many men with my background but it has made me violently angry at men who mistreat children for things that are not within their control. Simply put – if you can’t handle another man’s child then DO NOT GO THERE. It’s that simple; stick to childless women.
It never ceases to amaze me the amount of women who lament the way their boyfriend or husband treats their child and I would like that we find a way to prevent it. Some girls are naïve and stay with men who they assume will “come around” in loving their children, but girls – choose the child. That’s all I have to say, choose the child.See some words or phrases that you don't understand? Check out The Dragon's Lexicon.