What is it about some of us women, who once we meet the “love of our life”, we drop our association with “old friends”? I have a girlfriend whom I have spent many wonderful, hours with. Although we do not live in the same city, we used to make time visiting with each other and it was a special treat. We would shop, get spa treatments, workout, chat and laugh for hours, and discover new restaurants together.
Don’t get me wrong, I am happy that she (and others of you who might be guilty) has found love; however, what I don’t appreciate is the ad-hoc call you get once in a blue moon, filled with excuses, and then the bearing of the soul to get some reassurance, or to provide a shoulder to cry on.
I will be the first to encourage making your relationship a priority, and to take great care in being available to your honey. After all, it is important to spend quality time. But damn, does that mean being all up in each other’s face 24/7? Or are you? There are very few men I know who wants a “sticky” woman. There is nothing sexy about being too available. What’s the saying?“….absence makes the heart grow fonder?”
One of the things I have come to appreciate about my man is, I don’t have to rearrange my schedule or my life to fit him in. He is secure enough to do him while I do me; often times with my girls. Considering that we don’t see each other every day, it is tempting to cancel a planned jog, or event.
I guess it all boils down to balance. Often this behavior is carried over to when children come into the picture, and a woman allows herself to become consumed as a mother, to the point that her man feels neglected and left out. Happiness flourishes with self-actualization. Develop your individual self so you can be whole to share… Don’t lose your essential self.
Live, love, laugh.