Feb 21

A woman that has fallen head over heels for a guy will not have the clear judgment needed to see that everyone else in her life wants to cut his head off with a rusty blade. You may not know your douchebag boyfriend is hated until you break up and everyone admits that they thought he was an ass. But luckily for you there are tell-tale signs; normally you can judge through the thoughts and actions of male family members and “friends”. The latter is in quotations because male friends more than likely want to be more than that with you so they will probably give you a bad report on the guy anyway. So read the signs and ask your brothers, uncles or father and get multiple answers, don’t just trust dad’s feelings.

Jackass Signal 1 – Short visits from male family members

If you notice that people leave immediately after doing whatever favor you called them out to do when your man is present that is a huge red flag. You can ask why they have to leave so fast but they will never come out and say “because of that guy” but will spare your feelings and lie about being busy or sick. It isn’t coincidence if more than one person acts this way.

Jackass Signal 2 – You find yourself defending him (in your mind) often

He is around people you know and makes an off-color joke that pisses off your girlfriend. You think to yourself, oh they just don’t get his humor. He goes to a rather civil event and ends up in a fight. You think to yourself, these rednecks just wanted to pick a fight. He makes you wonder why your brother is acting so weird lately. It is never him, in your mind it is everyone else’s issues.

Jackass Signal 3 – You are off the invite list for Co-ed events

Remember before you had a boyfriend when it was cool for you to come to the Super Bowl party? How come this year you didn’t get an invite, and the host keeps avoiding you, the question and any answer remotely close to a yes or no? Nobody wants to spend Super Bowl Sunday in the presence of your new jackass that’s why!

Jackass Signal 4 – His Douchebag comments that you think are jokes

A jackass boyfriend can’t help but make little negative comments to you about your friends. What you have to realize is his innocent jokes at your friend’s expense are probably broadcast to them via things he may say (or do) while around them. He will say little things to you like “How come Lacey never has a man? I’m sure she’s a lesbian in waiting… for you”. To this you will think: “what does he know? Lacey has been my best friend for years”. Then you shrug it off. Then to Lacey one day at lunch he may ask in a certain tone “So Lacey where’s your man at?” or “do you two need some time alone without me around?”. These are probing questions that aren’t out of friendly curiosity. Lacey probably thinks to herself “what a douchebag she has found int his guy”  The whole time you don’t realize whats going on, because you’re so in love… so you miss it.

Jackass Signal 5 – You haven’t been told that he is cool

Look men are very aware of our strong but silent tendencies, so when we meet a dude who is a good guy for some woman we care about, we will easily volunteer the information. Your father will say “I like Terrence” and your brothers will say “Terrence is pretty cool”. If you haven’t gotten any affirmation that he is liked, then chances are he isn’t. TAKE A HINT!

So the bottom line is paying attention to family if you do care whether your man is a jackass or not. Your blind love will hide many of a man’s faults which can possibly be a deal-breaker when the honeymoon period has ended.

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