Jul 27

hot blonde on date

Men how many times have you read articles written by confused women asking why it is that they are single when they have sooo much to offer? How many talk shows, Reality TV interviews, books, etc. have shown us this drop dead gorgeous woman complaining about her inability to find a guy? Tons of them right?

What does a man say when he reads, hears or watches this stuff? A man thinks to himself “that’s all fine and dandy, but I bet she has a real annoying personality, or even worse – a ridiculous sense of entitlement.” I know that’s what crosses my mind, having known enough strong women in my time who remained chronically single, unaware that their poisonous demeanor was the culprit. I have learned that we all have a poor sense of self when reflecting back on why a date went south.

The woman in need thinks it’s everyone else’s fault but her own, she offers up excuses like the following for her inability to lock down a relationship: “never called me back after the date! I thought only little boys do that crap!”

Women if you find yourself single and listing off your resume when talking about it in the following manner “I’m independent, courageous, educated, good looking, kind-hearted, loving, blah, blah, blah”, chances are your ego may be leaking out on the date and the guy is immediately reminded of the one evil, domineering chick (who you probably are nothing like) that he once dealt with.

It doesn’t take a whole lot to stop a man from sticking it out on an annoying date to see if there is some sort of future (or at the very least some sex) at the end of the night. But if you turn out to be anything like the stereotypical man-eating she-beast that every man fears, he won’t be calling you back.

One night I was out on a date of my own with my girlfriend and I saw one of these “intelligent, independent, yet sweet and understanding” self-described women; she would not stop talking venting! This woman kept prattling on and on and on about herself and dude looked like he needed me to save him. About an hour into this she had the nerve to ask “how come you’re so quiet?” and I smiled despite myself thinking – she probably thinks that the date is going well.

a lonely woman

It takes a lot for a woman to dominate the Corporate job market and do the damn thing to become successful, but if all those board meetings, ass-kissing and kowtowing to necessary bosses hasn’t taught you when to talk and when to chill the hell out… chances are you will scare away 80% of the “successful” men that date you.

Successful men want an understanding woman; some may even see the powerhouse businesswoman as a potential partner in life and career. What successful men don’t want is an egotistical competitor who makes his home life even more stressful than the crap he deals with from 9 – 5. Sure you are Claire Huxtable in the career department, but can you be as respectful, loving, and intelligent as Claire when it comes to your man? Think on that for a second.

“I Just want a man to not give up on me!”

Women who say this don’t seem to realize how selfish it sounds to outsiders. The above quote makes you sound like a handful of issues, crazy, and expecting of the world to bend down for you. Successful, good guys don’t have the time to be patient with someone that cannot even hide their dark side within 2 dates. No lady, you have to earn that person not giving up on you, it isn’t owed.

Look, if you find yourself void of callbacks or quality prospects after 10 – 12 dates with various “good” men, it may be time for some soul searching. Run the highlight reel back on your date and watch for the moment when you fumbled the ball instead of actually… I don’t know… hmm… appeared interesting, sexy, or even nice!? Stop making it a man issue; we hold no sympathy for that kind of thinking. Look at what it is that you may be doing to piss us off mentally and slow it down a tad. I guarantee that doing this and backing up a bit, will yield you a patient man in good time.

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  • Dee

    This article reminds me of ‘He’s Just Not That Into You”

    The article highlights an interesting point that is often not made, leading women to feel so entitled to a good relationship they may not even deserve. When was the last time you heard some guy being loud in a bar commenting on how great he is and that he needs to find a woman who is worthy of his laundry list of desirable qualities. He would sound like an egotistical creep! Women are never called out on this kind of behavior, as if being put on a pedestal is a right of the female gender…

    I know a few mid-thirties women who are having trouble finding relationships, even though they are smart, attractive etc. But all they do is talk about themselves, and shallow topics like all the different ways they are trying to loose weight, or gossip about other people. What guy, or girl for that matter wants to hear all about that stuff. It would be like going on a date with a guy and all he talks about is his car, or his favorite baseball team! Lame. Women need to try to be more interesting. There are plenty of sweet, attractive girls out there, but not enough that are also interesting and INTERESTED.

    I also have some younger friends that had babies at a young age because they didn’t think they were worthy of a good man that would actually put a ring on their finger. Now they have too much baggage and the good men are scared off. Can’t ladies find a happy medium between egotistical and completely lacking self worth…

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