I have noticed that many people like to stress over the person that their ex has moved on to marry, date or sleep with. They observe the new lover and run comparison checks with themselves in order to laugh at her if she did worse, or feel salty if she did better.
While I personally would never partake in this activity it seems to be a sort of curious human nature, which most people are guilty of.
One of the most devastating things a man can fathom is that his girl of many years will run off and become a lesbian. It is a huge blow to his ego, an offense aimed squarely at his lack of a potent sex game. A blow that must not be known by his peers lest he be laughed at and lose face for being such a weak man that his woman would feel the need to forgo the entire male race as a whole.
There’s a huge problem with this line of thinking.
Oft times the ego comes into play and if the man still has feelings for the woman he will internalize it as some sort of failure on his part. Nowhere does he consider that she may like both men and women so her moving on would have the chance at her meeting a great gal that she can be happy with.
Stop Thinking Like a Cave Man & ReProgram Your Thinking
For the angry, bitter ex-boyfriend, he will chalk it up to her not being able to “handle men” or some other foolishness, which again is all about his ego and no amount of explanation will let him believe otherwise.
The conservative, prejudiced world sees anything outside of heteronormative relationships as strange and insane. Especially when it comes to us men, we can be at our most cruel when it comes to this particular topic.
It is due to our programming through society, a society that at one time made it a normal and lucrative thing to enslave people, snatch their land (this still happens through war), and commit genocide and ethnic cleansing.
I say all this to reason with my fellow men that everything does not have to do with us, and when we move out of a relationship we should not be offended by who we are replaced with.
Out of The Closet, Into The Light
Men, do we ever consider the fact that our ex was living a life of denial that had finally gotten too thick to hold down? Consider this quote:
“A pimp told me if I love her I should let her go” – Common
If you were in love with the woman that is now your ex then be happy for her that she has finally felt comfortable to come out. Move on my dude, the more noise you make about it, the more pathetic you look. What will causing her more pain and confusion gain you other than douchebag points?
Your ex’s choice in partner may have nothing to do with you and you should accept that unless she tells you different. Our friends will say silly things like “let me get at her, I’ll bring her back on our side” but that’s just jokes at your expense.
Get over it and if you’re still friends with her then accept it, deal with it and be a good dude.
Keeping it classy can be tough when you’re programmed to react like a savage, but you must ask yourself – “am I better than that?” Of course you are, so what your ex-girlfriend has a girlfriend, no big deal, lets get over ourselves fellas. Keep it classy!See some words or phrases that you don't understand? Check out The Dragon's Lexicon.