Mar 21

men ogling a woman

One of the most common things that guys tend to do when they see an irresistibly beautiful woman or an ultra-hot dime piece is to ogle her like a starving dog and allow invisible nails to plant them to the ground.

On the flip side you may have a pack of lames who make a game out of it in order to fire themselves up – each taking turns at approaching the woman with weak lines. This is even worse than saying or doing nothing as it drives a woman to become hostile instead of aloof at your distance admiration.

When I was a younger man I would defeat the long-distance stare by forcing my legs to put me into a situation that my mouth had to get out of. What I mean by this is that when I saw a beautiful woman – that I wanted – I would approach her.

Did I get rejected? Yes, quite a bit but it built my character to be fearless in the face of rejection. Before long I could approach, engage, and talk to women without fear. If she wasn’t down for the program it was okay because there were plenty more to try my hand at.

Do this the next time you are out and about and see a beautiful woman – scan the room for random guys and look at what is going on. Chances are you will find a room full of people checking her out but none of them will talk to her. There’s an advantage to this for you if things continue in that vein… you can be the difference-maker… go, get her name and ask her to dance.

Many guys hold on to this hopeless assumption that cute girls will send back obvious signals that they want to be approached… not all the time guys. Hell I would go out on a limb and say that it barely ever happens. It’s up to you to convince that shy cutie that you’re worth the attention.

Tell you what you have a ton of things working against you when you approach but at least you rolled the dice. Stand their admiring women and you will become one of the furniture to them. Force them to say no and stop allowing your eyes to deify hot women.

It’s as simple as that when it comes to game… Nike! Just do it.

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  • I failed miserably the other day – To be fair, I was sporting a ginger beard…

  • Tony

    Failure is part of the package. Figure out what you have to do to improve and try it again.

  • LatteLady

    As a woman I can say that it’s not a hopeless assumption that she will send out signals if she’s interested. I don’t want to be approached by men I’ve not given any signals to, I’ve found it extremely annoying.

    When you say: “plenty more to try my hand it”, that reads as very impersonal & as a woman who gets approach regularly, I can feel the difference and it’s a huge difference between the man who is seeing it as a numbers game and I’m woman number 400 or the man who has taken the time to think through whether or not I seem interested (eye contact guys, eye contact!) first, then assessed if the eye contact is held more than once. Then, if this has occurred, look for a feint smile for that extra certainty and most of all as well as eye contact, really take time to read her general body language. I immediately turn away or look down if I don’t want to be approached or snap eye contact away quickly (if I’ve made accidental eye contact with a man who’s interested in me but I don’t feel the same way).
    Get well versed at reading body language, especially if you’re dealing with shy women, then and only then approach, otherwise she’s going to feel like a lottery ticket or some other inanimate object, which does not feel special. My advice is avoid just diving in with every woman you see but make more conscious choices to socialise with women in situations where you can get to learn something about them without the agenda of “getting them” and certainly without the main focus and key aim of getting to know her because she’s beautiful because the connection is more important for her. She wants to feel special & cherished not part of a numbers game. You really will have more chance of succeeding when you seek a true connection with a few women you meet rather than just chatting to hundreds of women indiscriminately – because we can sense that’s what you’re doing & it’s not flattering. Change your mind set to a more positive on and think about the woman first – look for and study the details about her rather than just diving in eg what coffee does she drink, does she seem nervous? (maybe reference how nervous you are, if it’s a new class you’re both attending) – rather than focusig on the odds of “winning” like it’s a game, Russian roulette or she’s a vending machine. That way you’ll have a much better chance of meeting someone who will continue to grow to like you, because you treated her like the special individual she is not just a number in a numbers game. I hope you all find someone you be happy with, not just temporarily infatuated with based on looks – because believe me, that’s not enough. Find common ground then see if you have a connection. If so, explore that and don’t be afraid of discussing your feelings. Men have that luxury now – thank God, as many of us women have been waiting for years for it to be seen as socially acceptable! – so you can you can be emotionally open, honest & available. The guys that I like eg don’t get the words out right most of the time! They’re just emotionally open and don’t flit from girl to girl and then back to me because they’re “trying their hand” as part of a numbers game. The latter is an absolute turn off. What gets my attention is a man who makes a conserted effort to get to know me on a deeper level (rather than just using a superficial chat up line) through observation.

  • ennis

    Mr. Dragon- Oh, how wonderful! It is up to ME to prove to HER that I am worth HER attention? You must be insane. Let the women approach! Like you just said, rejection will help build heir characters!