Girlfriend for a time, wifey for an hour, gold-digger for 5 minutes, whatever you want to call these beautiful nymphets of the night, the last thing you want to call them is genuine. The Stripper/John relationship is a game: you came to pay, she comes to dance for your pleasure and you go home to reality.
Truth be told, not all men go home to masturbate or give their wives passionate sex after the strip club. Some guys go home, business as usual to fall asleep, play video games or play editor for their ezine (sigh). I write this article for a special set of guys however who leave the Club thinking that they have found true love. Though these men aren’t necessarily suckers, tricks, or losers; they misunderstand the stripper’s intentions and go home with the girl’s fake number, Facebook/Twitter account and dream of those perfect breasts being theirs sometime in the future. They get their feelings hurt when the number turns out to be fake, or when they go to her supposed Facebook account and it is a different woman altogether. It isn’t a few times that I have had to have “the talk” with new friends that I’ve taken to the strip club. The typical discourse being:
NewGuy: Man Lacy is so hot, and she was feeling me!
*Me: Uh huh… how much did you spend in V.I.P.?
NewGuy: A couple hundred but I got her number and email (grins proudly)
*Me: You really liked her huh? I did notice that she hung out with you the entire night.
NewGuy: Ya I’m gonna call her tomorrow, man she really opened up to me. She has a kid and does this part-time, and blah, blah, blah…
Get on my lap but stay out of my head
Strippers can ensorcel a man’s head quicker than any woman can. Guys go in there and they will become a temporary girlfriend if you let them. Most girls will hang out (if you’re paying), they’ll cozy up to you, sit on your lap, play with your junk and tell you that you are a god amongst men. They will confide in you if you seem like the nice guy type, they will play with you if you’re the playful, risky type and they will run down their history if you’re the “big daddy” type (guilty). It’s all bullshit but you love it, how could you not? All of this unbridled attention from a woman who wouldn’t even glance at you out in the daylight… yet here she is pouring her heart out to you while carressing your junk with her bare ass cheeks. An hour into it, “do you want a dance?” Hell ya you want that dance, you’re drunk on that woman’s scent, sexiness and the facade of her giving a shit about you.
But there’s nothing wrong with that, it’s the way of the Strip Club, she’s yours for a few hours, go ahead and love it, relax, and have fun. I just stress that once the night air hits you, that you return to the guy you were before you entered and leave that woman knowing that it was an even exchange of services. Sure there will be times when you are the man of her dreams and she wants to take it beyond the club. This article isn’t for that rare situation, see 9 times out of 10 if that’s what time it is, you will know way ahead of time. My advice goes out to you even if you crossed the line and had sexual relations within that V.I.P. room. She’s the sole controller and if it was good enough to have you falling in love with it then that’s your own damn fault for going there, she isn’t your woman.
Keep it Gangster
So when you enter the next Strip Club remember, it’s strictly business but her business is that of pleasure. Stop fooling yourself that all strippers are idiots waiting for the next super-nerd to swoop in, pay for a dance and a drink and then whisk her off into the sunset. Those women are working girls, most of them hate men (blame daddy but that’s another article) and you are one of many that come to pay them to play your part of sexist pig. Can you not enjoy that without being weird about it? Come on men, you’ve heard it a million times, you don’t find love in the Club and you damn sure won’t find it in a Strip Club.See some words or phrases that you don't understand? Check out The Dragon's Lexicon.