I came across a Gent by the name of Pete Sapper, a confidence relationship coach that tackles the root of insecurity that stems from fear in women and turns wallflowers into the powerful, confident Goddesses that they deserve to be. I truly admire his attitude after coming across plenty of BS from relationship experts who wrongly preach that most men are idiots and that this whole feminist wave is all good. I’m not one to complain as my own book The 21st Century Spartanite: The Strong Woman’s Guide To Ultimate Success is written from a liberal feminist perspective and two chapters are solely given to the RIGHT TYPE of man. I can only speak from a very subjective female perspective. High Value Women The difference between high and low valued women in the world is cultivating their own worth. I’ve often been called all types of pejorative names under the sun for standing my ground, for… [Read more]

One of the best feelings a man can have when it comes to the dating game is a feeling of content. What I mean by this is that when you have other things going on—several women in your phone who are somewhat available when called—and no pressure to get into anything serious, you are the cock of the walk. Let me explain why. There have been times when I had a phone full of numbers, accessible ex-girlfriend, and my dress game, physique and wallet were on point. There is nothing you could tell me to do for some woman’s attention that I felt I had to do. No, the attitude was – if she wants some of this then she would come get some of this. Needless to say I was on a celebrity level of high when I went out. Now let’s compare the above to the times when I hadn’t been in a… [Read more]

This was the feedback I received from a number of black women when I wrote a guest post about the positives in dating a tomboy. The women who responded seemed to come from 3 separate camps – those who genuinely liked the article, former tomboys who appreciated the article, and religious bigots who wanted to spin it into a “gays are running our Christian earth” type of thing. Here’s a quote from one of the responses that took my sexuality to task: Jo: “sooo, are you saying you’re bi or something? I’m sorry, but if you like a girl who acts like a man, hates other girls (or pretends that other girls except herself are “catty” is a HUGE sign of ugly insecurity and hypocrisy), likes beer and football and farting, well, guess what? You dont like a girl, you like a guy.” Thank goodness there were some sane folks in the commentary, one being… [Read more]

  “Dear Dragon, I read your site often and I am a big Jessica Alba fan (seen her on your top 100) but my girl is giving me all sorts of grief about her. What do you say about a girl who gets jealous about your celebrity crush? I notice that she even talks about dudes like Bradley Cooper and I don’t even trip over it but she get mad over Alba? Sup with that?” – Frustrated Fred Men of the Hall, take this however you want to take it but if you are with a new girl and she freaks out over your liking a celebrity woman or watching porn then you are in for a world of hurt if you stick around. There is nothing positive that comes out of dating a control freak with low self-esteem and that chick will ruin you and waste your time by the time she’s finished. A… [Read more]

There’s an understanding amongst men (sometimes expressed in conversation) about women when it comes to dating. Men as a whole expect that a bachelor, with money, and a good head for conversation can bag any chick he wants all because we have women bottled up into a casual stereotype for our understanding. We see women as the prized deer (with horns) that we have to coax into our trap nice and easy, just before pulling the trigger and snacking on venison burgers. The coaxing of course is assumed to be money, charm and a whole line of bull. So what are some of the things that your casual male date may be assuming when he texts you the address to the comedy show that you planned to go see? Take a look at these 5 things… sure they won’t make you happy, but trust me – it is what it is. 1. Women Can Be… [Read more]

Long distance relationships are tricky and take quite a bit of navigating as you work your way through knowing a person and building a memory bank. For those of us who have our lover just around the corner who we see practically every day, knows the challenges we face and will agree that long distance relationships are not for the feint of heart and the insecure. When you are in a long distance relationship, you tend to depend on different means of contact as a measure of the health of your relationship. When you don’t hear from your sweetie, you might resort to second-guessing yourself by asking, “Is he thinking about me?” “Is someone else siphoning her affection?” Many times these shadowy bits of our imagination are dispelled by the next call or visit, and in some cases may open up a keg of insecurity like a leaking ulcer demonstrated by questions and accusations of… [Read more]

Once in a while when a man and a woman is dating there begins to surface a set of questions from the woman as to whether the man is still interested or not. Women let me get this out there first before I address the questions; men aren’t going to give you their heart and intent on a subject matter just because you ask it. This goes for dumb questions like asking a man if he’s gay and it goes for seemingly innocent questions like whether or not we’re bored. Most of the time we either don’t know or we won’t tell you for fear of it becoming the subject of the night. Let a man chill the hell out and he will value your company more than you think. I like to call the question circus “hen pecking”. Have you ever seen chicken go at some feed when there’s barely any left? They peck,… [Read more]

There are many insecure men, countless actually and while they may not come off that way on the surface, in reality they are scared to death. What Makes A Man Insecure The quick answer to this question is society. The same problems that plague women, plague men just the same. Men feel that if they aren’t the richest, most handsome baller in the world, women will not want them. If they find a woman that loves them, it makes them worry that she won’t stick around. There is no cure for a man’s insecurity, he has to cross that bridge of confidence on his own. If a woman is with a man like this she will have many nights of consoling him, telling him she isn’t going anywhere and dealing with his jealous overreactions. A Man Shouldn’t Compare Himself To His Woman If you’re a confident man then you don’t add up what you have… [Read more]