Jun 10

Rule #51 (No cameras at The Bachelor Party):

Sometimes we suffer a lapse in judgment and become blind to the effect that a cause brings especially when that cause involves a camera, a few half naked women and alcohol. As with sending images of one’s privates to a woman that will dump you and share the pictures with her Twitter, it is better to just say no to “lasting memories”. Leave the camera at home, a bachelor party is a private send-off for your male friends. Violating this sacred tradition is violating a man law.

Rule #52 (Sweet Etiquette):

When you’re out with another man at a restaurant be sure to pass on dessert. Two men have no business ordering dessert together at the end of a meal. Even if one of you gets a dessert the waitress will still bring 2 spoons.

Rule #53 (Fruity Drinks):

Men don’t tell other men what to drink but a man is allowed to break your balls on having decorations in your glass if and only if he’s a friend. When you start to judge a stranger’s drink you may make the mistake of calling the manliest of all cocktails “the vodka Martini” a woman’s drink and get yourself pistol whipped and shot by 007’s golden gun. Check yourself Shut up and mind your own business.

Rule #54 (Seat Capacity):

As a general rule a bike (motorcycle or bicycle) has a one male capacity. If bike’s were meant to seat multiple men then they’d be cars…

Rule #55 (Bathroom Buddies):

Im gonna say like this – the bathroom may be a place to hail up friends within reason but it is NOT the place to meet new friends. Don’t ask me about sports while im taking a dump and don’t wait around making small talk while I zip myself up… it’s just odd.

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