Mar 18

couple texting at table

As technology advances and women continue to roar with independence, it is only inevitable that age-old constructs meant to extend special privilege to one sex would fall apart in lieu of gender equality. Yes girls I am talking about that wonderful “chivalry” that you scream about being dead.

The irony with chivalry is that in a perfect world it would extend to both sexes, but it hasn’t. When you want men to open doors, walk on the more dangerous part of the sidewalk, and pull out your chair then you should probably extend some courtesy too.

You Are Not The Women of The 80’s and 90’s

What has happened for so long that women got used to it, is that men would push, beg, and do whatever it takes to garner their interest. Now when younger, desirable men learn their worth, have accepted that women are on an open playing field, and know that they no longer have to try hard… well guess what? They begin to do things to cut out the users, and abusers.

In the past it was very easy for a woman to go out to a Night Club, strut her stuff and score free drinks (some still can). It was not uncommon to see men competing for her phone number in order to call her and promote themselves in order to possibly get a date (again, some men still do this).

As boys we would give girls our money – since Uncles would tell us that’s what men did for their women. We would be over-protective, delicate, anything it took to keep her around, but the modern age has shown us that this is deemed condescending. So what’s a man to do when he realizes that it’s an even playing field? Well he normalizes his behavior and find shortcuts… that is what he does.

Technology Is a Man’s Best Friend

cutie on a cellIn this age of smart phones, social media, and the mighty Google, men have absolutely no need to chase women like they did when I was a young man. We can just follow you on Twitter or befriend you on Facebook to poke at you later whenever it’s date night. There’s texting which can be done at the job, at a red light, or whenever we feel like it.

Hell, I look back at some of the privileged, terrible women I have dated and wished there was a texting period where I could have weeded them out, or at least went Dutch on dates so that they could bore me in an inexpensive way! Guys nowadays have it made!

So whenever I see these articles popping up on the internet from women wanting to be courted in the way their mothers and grandmothers were, it makes me realize that they are out of touch. For every woman who likes the extra things a man does there is another screaming “don’t patronize me!” and it has lead to nothing but frustration.

I would say that on a grand scale the misandry of bitter women, the neutralizing of the genders, and ultimately technology has shown us that courtship is no longer wanted or needed. So women of a former age, you had better get used to texting, and if you like the guy, be sure to keep it interesting. Female privilege on the dating front is in its death throes and no matter how much want it back, it is not going to reverse itself.

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  • PBailey

    This article is absolutely ridiculous. I’m a married man. As I read this piece, I couldn’t help but sense the bitterness in your tone. And what were you bitter about? A world in which chivalry isn’t extended to both sexes!? I don’t want a woman pulling the chair out for me, paying for my dinner, or placing herself in harm’s way for me. No self-respecting man desires that regardless of women’s advancement in the workplace. No man shies away from courting and everything that comes with the pursuit of women because of misinterpretations about feminism. Feminism, which refers to equal opportunity, does not excuse men from being, well…men! Technology will never substitute the natural order of things. Boy meets girl, boy chases girl, boy gets girl.

    • Thanks for commenting but your comment is not accurate, it’s an opinion from a very subjective position. Your view of feminism is definitely not what we have read, seen and experienced so either your glasses are rose tinted, you have been married too long to notice what’s going on, or you’re using a canned explanation for it – it’s called feminism not humanism which pretty much sums up what it is despite what the new definition is sold as.

      In terms of bitter (which is another word people use to attack those who say things they dislike… just like misogyny) I’m happily in a relationship and still do chivalrous things, but this doesn’t mean that I think every man should be the same. I was raised to be this way, have had enough “bitter” women act stink for me being courteous to where I have every right to not be chivalrous but I’m stubborn.

      I read articles, talk to people and deal with angry women on a regular basis who label themselves feminist and their goal is not what you described. Talk to the men who have experienced “real” feminism and ask them if it feels like equal opportunity to them.

      • PBailey

        Feminism come in many shades (i.e., radical feminism, liberal feminism, etc.) and is more complex than “angry women”, as you suggest. And humanism isn’t a synonym for feminism any more than Civil Rights is. I haven’t been married long, I just think chivalry isn’t the problem. That’s all.

    • McThick

      I rather doubt that Greg is asking to have his chair pulled out. I think that the point was, rather, that chivalry is a two way street. Most women today seem to feel that it is entirely about female privilege, which it is not. For chivalry to work, men must do certain things, and women must both let them do it and appreciate that it is being done. When I hold a door, she damn well needs to come up with a “Thank you” instead of the more typical action, which is to just breeze through as though I’m not even there.

      This attitude extends further into a relationship. Men are supposed to do the work and financially support the ‘household.’ Most women are absolutely fine with that aspect, but shy away when it comes to the traditionally female roles in that arrangement. If I’m supporting her at home all day, she needs to be at home supporting me.

      As for female privilege in the dating scene, I can’t say. I’ve been out of it for far too long. However, if things line up as Greg says, then I guess I am a little bitter! Or at least jealous that I was too stupid to learn the easier way.