Mar 22

Older white man with black girlfriend standing next to a private jet

So you have been wanting a girlfriend (within your race) for some time and have found it to be a task. This could be due to a lack of that certain type of woman in your area, compatibility issues, bad luck, or something you personally do to turn women off. Whatever the reason, you find yourself at a crossroads in life – one path demanding that you broaden your horizons, the other will leave you lonely for years to come. What I am about to offer you men that are in this situation is a bit of perspective on interracial dating and what it is that disallows you from trying it – with a suggestion on how to get past it.

Why Should You Branch out?

Believe it or not, most men think the same way you do and it makes sense when you think about it. We grow up within a society that keeps us separated into our own little pockets of the world and race is merely a tiny facet of even that when we have class, religion, and culture to add to the mix. When you look at all the aspects of life that defines us – it is almost default to want to find a mate that echoes our likeness in look, love and experience. For those of us who are radical, adventurous and independent however, we look for women in a much broader ocean than the lake back home.

The reasons to get a little radical and branch out should be practical. Think of it this way: if there were only 5 people left on earth and you were the last of whatever you are, would your beliefs cause you to not hook up with one of them? If the answer is yes then stop reading this right now. If the answer is no then consider the reasons why you only look within one dating pool for a potential mate. The following is an example of a valid and invalid reason why you would exclusively date within your own race.

Valid: You have a preference based on look/culture/religion of that type of woman.
Invalid: Your parents, siblings and friends would not agree.

Fry from Futurama saying I see what you did there

If you didn’t catch what I did there, I separated a personal desire (valid) from what you think that other people will think (invalid). See men (historically) that have found love beyond racial lines, did not allow the outside world to define them. it’s that simple! Do you want a girlfriend, or does your racist daddy want her? Think about it, your relationship is a personal one, a love between you and her.

Making The First Step

To get out of your bubble you will have to de-alienate women that don’t look like you. Here are a couple of tips to getting past your bias and prejudiced opinions:

1. Change your habits: You’re single so naturally you watch adult movies or naughty pics… how about mixing it up a bit? Black girls, white girls, Asian girls, foreign women, etc., etc. Trust me, as men we will date who we masturbate to, so if you are seeing Rosey Palmer on a nightly basis, tell her to change up her look once in awhile.

2. Talk to other people: If you have friends in interracial relationships you should talk to them about their lives. Does their racist family play nice when they are there or is it an ongoing problem that takes work? Remove the guesswork and you will find that it becomes a lot easier to accept.

3. Dump your ignorant friends: Do you have an opinionated jackass associate who you fear will give you all sorts of hell for branching out? Dump him quick and hang out with more open-minded induviduals.  I find that people will let one sole person affect their entire life and I don’t understand why people allow it to happen.

Last but not least you should have a cosmopolitan group of friends. If you have friends who all look the same then your interracial relationship may come off as a sham to them, a fad, or an experiment, and they will have little to no understanding of your situation.

So in closing, I would ask you – single guy with no luck dating within your race, to keep it as a personal choice before broadening your pool of dating. Remember to prep yourself properly before making this huge step towards your love life and tell the haters to stay out of you and yours or risk losing you as a friend or family member forever.

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