Jul 10

george clooney

I have made myself a promise to never be one of these people that pushes matrimony or relationships as the ultimate human experience on single friends and I absolutely hate when I see or hear it. People come off as overly simple when they do these things and it has a religious feel to it (I will explain).

Have you ever had a friend who found a religion late and swears up and down that it is the ultimate answer to life? It is so important to them that everybody MUST be in on it or he just cannot rest. I am sure that more than a few of you readers are nodding yes to this.

If you answered no to my question above then you can interchange the religion with Network Marketing, a new diet, or something else not as major a life-change as religion. The point being that these people become zombies in our life.

Zombies!? What the hell do you mean?

Well a zombie is the embodiment of a parasite that we once loved but has changed into something that we would rather avoid or shoot in the head (not literally) in order to save ourselves. Just think about it; you can’t ever go to visit them or have them over for fear of them breaking out their copy of Kingdom Hall or the good book to save your soul.

 The same can be said about annoying married guy who thinks he has the world figured out because he rolled a few sixes on the die of life.

You know these people; it’s all about love, religion and dying happy with the kids well-adjusted after college. They have no respect for your single life where your own space is good enough because they don’t understand it and even worse they won’t even try to understand it.

Look married folks and relationship junkies, if you have a single friend who seems to avoid the living hell out of you this may be a good reason why. It’s wonderful that you have found your link to life, but your elixir may not be one that is useful to everyone.

Single-hood is nothing new

Looking back at the olden days there have always been single people; this was either by circumstance or by choice but it has always been here. The real downside to being single that I have found has to do with stupid people’s perception. Yes I said and 100% mean stupid people.

  • Being single will get you rumors of being gay – just check public perception on George Clooney or any other good looking bachelors in Hollywood.
  • Being single will get you introduced to every buck-toothed cousin of your married friend’s.
  • Being single will get you scrutinized and pitied by co-workers who know little to nothing about your personal life.
  • Being single will get you even more rumors of being gay by people whose cultures are all about marriage and babies at 18 years or older (you know who you are).
  • Being single will make you the talk of the hour for the standard boring couple’s get-togethers.

If half of these people would sit back and analyze whether a person is happy single or not then half of the chatter and “hook-ups” would end. There are unhappy singles who beg for help to end that status and there are happy singles who are actually good with their #foreveralone statuses and do not wish to be hooked up, scrutinized or “helped” by their coupled up family and friends.

As I stated before; it all smacks of religion as the basis for the pushing and forcing of someone into the convenient pocket of the hive as a married member of society. So I ask you happily single denizens of the Hall, am I right or am I right with this? Some people are meant to be single and there is no such thing as a “soul mate” out there for everyone.

See some words or phrases that you don't understand? Check out The Dragon's Lexicon.
  • When you say single do you mean unattached or not married?

    • I mean unmarried men but some attached men can bypass the single label based on their level of commitment. This article speaks to those who don’t want or believe in marriage even though they can be with one woman for life.