I’ve never had a good relationship with any of my friends’ girls. Most guys have the same problem, which is why the “buddy vs girlfriend” dynamic is used in so many movies. It’s something all men can relate to!
Sometimes, it doesn’t make any sense. The sweetest of girls will make your blood boil after dating your friend for a few months. And no matter how awesome you are, the feeling is always mutual.
But by understanding why we hate our friends’ girlfriends, you can avoid unnecessary drama and keep things cool and friendly between everyone.
What Have You Done To My Friend?
We each have a few social roles we play. With our parents, we act like children; with co-workers, we act like professionals; with our buddies, we act like bros.
When your homie starts going steady with a girl, he takes on a new role: the boyfriend. Suddenly, the awesome dude you know is gone, replaced by (what you think is) a sissified woman-pleaser. He obsesses over everything She does; freaks out when She’s upset; talks about Her constantly.
Seeing a man in this emasculated state pisses us off – and we blame the girlfriend for the change. We wonder what happened to our guy, who used to be so uncaring and tough with other women. We discuss “what this skank is doing to him” between ourselves.
Just remember that it all works both ways. To a girl, watching the man she loves burp, curse and play video games all day sucks. And guess who brings that side of him out? That’s right: us, his friends!
I Haven’t Seen You In Months, Dude
Girlfriends have a tendency to “steal” our friends. A guy in a new relationship can ignore his crew for weeks and months – a gross violation of the Bro Code!
We hate this because single guys are used to doing stuff together. We use our “man-time” to bond over the smallest of things, i.e. Pizza Thursdays and Paintball Sundays.
Girls don’t understand these activities; to them, what we do ranges from “loser crap” to “big waste of time.” So they coax, coerce and sweet-talk their men into spending more time with them and less time with us.
Which is an unforgivable transgression.
When a friend is busy getting laid, we get it. But seeing a man go for cocktails with Her friends when we could be watching all 6 Star Wars movies back-to-back is just wrong.
It’s Called Betrayal
During the first few months of a relationship, both sexes are on their best behavior. We all want to make a good impression. For girls, getting the approval of her man’s friends is a part of that.
She’ll go out for beers with the crew; try to hook us up with her single friends; play a game of guitar hero here and there.
All that changes when the honeymoon period’s over. When a woman knows she’s “secured” her boyfriend, she has fewer reasons to be nice to his friends.
This is normal girl behavior, but we’re man – and so we feel betrayed. The girl who we thought was kind of OK becomes “Becky, who started acting like a cold bitch lately.”
In The End
Some girls really are bitches – evil jezebels straight outta hell you can’t help but hate.
But for the most part, it’s natural for men to hate their friends’ girlfriends. They compete for one man’s time; want to see him play different social roles; tend to have few common interests.
Just remember that your buddy’s chick cares about him just as much – or even more – than you do. Do your best to understand her and keep things friendly – if only for his sake. One of these girls he’s seeing might be there for life.See some words or phrases that you don't understand? Check out The Dragon's Lexicon.