Apr 05

couple disagreement

It is never a good idea to play dirty when it comes to love; though it goes without saying that we all have been guilty of doing this at one time. We should do better about avoiding dirty games, make a better attempt at avoiding the use of past slights, dirty laundry and imperfections to attack our significant others. It never amounts to anything, certainly not “winning the argument”, plus when the coin flips to the other side it is us who get burned by the person we love.

Love is rarely the perfection that we see in movies, and to think that getting into a relationship without conflict, disagreements and arguments is just naive. The common occurrence with arguments in relationships is the use of low handed tactics in order to win. This can end up being unforgivable and devastating if the slight being brought up has deep-rooted emotional value.

Let’s say for example the man decides to party all night at a buddy’s bachelor party and comes home in the morning. His wife then takes offense and retaliates by dressing like a whore and runs out to the night club to flirt with strange men.

The same guy who finds out that his wife went out partying decides that he will accidentally throw away some photos she has of her boyfriend when they were in High School. What makes this especially bad is that the wife is still friends with her old flame and cherishes the photos. The man could have simply sat her down, explained the full situation and expressed his anger, instead he took the childish and more damaging route of destroying a piece of history that he felt she shouldn’t have anyway.

Women – when a man does not notice your beautiful haircut, do not take it as such a slight that you vow never to give him his proper’s on anything he’s ever proud of. Most of the time a man DOES notice your beauty but can feel that you understand he loves you so the need to compliment is unnecessary. This is when “knowing” how your man’s nature is should be the primary factor in your expectation. Sure your girlfriend’s husband spews compliments all day long but that does not mean he loves his wife more than your guy loves you!

Men jealousy is not a macho trait; when you see your girl talking to a strange man, have some confidence that she is yours. Don’t force her to go explaining herself to ease your jealousy; a confident man has no need of this if all they were doing was talking. Any man worth a damn would go over there, introduce himself, feel the guy out and then kept it moving. It is the jealousy, passive aggressive, childish games that we play against one another that can ruin relationships in the end.

Going for retaliation on the person with whom you’ve shared your heart is an enormous defeat in purpose; it is hardly worth your time. Kiss and make up, communicate like friends and bring some clarity to the situation. This is the key.

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