In this world we have some pushy, entitled people who like to think that the world revolves around them when it comes to love. If you want to know if you are one of these people then check if you would answer yes to any of the following:
- Claim ownership to your lover after having sex even though he/she has not agreed to become your exclusive boyfriend/girlfriend.
- Get jealous and angry if a woman you are dating is seen out with a guy having drinks.
- Refuse to claim a woman as your girl but disallow any other guy to talk to her.
Sorry ladies and gents but there is no extra step between dating and relationship; to let someone convince you otherwise is to do yourself a disservice as it only means that they are stringing you along in order to have a pass to “cheat” without repercussions. If a woman wants you to be exclusive then she must commit, and I don’t mean to pinky swear that she won’t bake pink cookies for the other guy she’s dating, I mean that she has to refer to herself as your lady and you as her man.
You ought to figure out if you are serious enough about her to claim her as your girl, or if you want to keep her on dating status so that you can continue to get the booty without any commitment. Sounds awesome right? Well the drawback to this latter status of course is that you cannot carry on like a jealous boyfriend/husband ever… because you aren’t… you’re just her f-ck buddy.
Pimp For A Day…
I can recall a while back I met this beautiful young woman who I thought about all the time, wishing she could be my girl. A few events, near falls into the friend-zone and cock blocking antics later and we found ourselves in bed with one another, going at it as if the world was at the brink of destruction if we didn’t drain every single ounce of bodily fluid before the morning. It was glorious but I was young and like all young men you start to get a tad bit stupid the morning after you’ve had sex with a dime piece… you start to think of how gangster it would be if she was only the 1st in a long line of fuck buddies that sit inside your little black book.
Young men reading, I implore you that when these thoughts start to circulate in your head – go and knock your head against a wall.
I thought of myself as being too cool and because she didn’t corner me afterwards to handcuff me into the “boyfriend” title, I started on a quest to catch another one. This was all good until I saw her talking to another dude and I realized that I was feeling territorial. But how was this even fair, shouldn’t a player feel aloof? Again… young mind, not thinking clearly. Eventually I confronted her and took a dozen eggs in the face from embarrassment when I was reminded that I was nothing to her and had never asked for exclusivity.
Unless you’re dealing with a woman with little to no self-image, you cannot have your cake and eat it too. If you like the girl then lock her up temporarily and deal with having the tag of boyfriend at least for a little while. People who use terms such as “dating exclusively” are fooling themselves because it’s just a nicer way of saying “holding your dumbass off for a moment to see if I can do better”. A smart girl will peep game and you will lose her faster than you can ever imagine.
So don’t be afraid of the boyfriend title; if things don’t work out then it’s as simple as having “the talk” and moving on with your lives. People who argue that the “exclusive dating” phase is time taken to get to know one another are forgetting that boyfriend/girlfriend is not marriage and you can learn one another all the same. It’s not your world, it’s everybody’s world, and you have to realize that nobody wants to play by your rules just because you invent them.
Snap out of it and make a firm decision, will you be a boyfriend, or is she just fire wood for you to chop up when it’s cold?See some words or phrases that you don't understand? Check out The Dragon's Lexicon.